When he was about to reach the restaurant, Gu Yansheng put Shen Kanyu down, straightened his coat for him, and straightened his messy short hair, and said softly, "Go in."
Shen Kanyu didn't respond, and didn't move, he just stood there, staring blankly at Tian Tian who was surrounded by Song Li Sahuan in the restaurant, stretched out his hand to caress the window, his thin and trembling fingers struggled to outline his daughter's outline slowly , then turned his head and smiled contentedly at Gu Yansheng with a pale face: "Asheng... I see Tiantian."
Gu Yansheng pulled his hand from the window and gently held it: "Well, let's go in."
Shen Kanyu didn't seem to hear Gu Yansheng's words, and continued with a smile: "She... seems to have gained weight, also, grown taller, and her hair has also grown, so she can wear a pigtail."
Gu Yansheng smiled and said, "Could you go over and help her comb it?"
"Asheng, can you comb one for her, please? Tiantian told me that she wants that kind of high braid that soars to the sky, but every time I try to comb it for her, it will make her very hurt..." Shen Kanyu said softly Then, she took a step back, "I won't go in... I'll wait for you outside, don't worry about me, just stay with her for a while longer."
He thought for a while, and then said: "Is it troublesome for me to be here... Then I'll walk back after a while, A Sheng, don't worry about me."
Gu Yansheng firmly held his cold and hard hand, and gently wiped away the thin layer of water marks from the corners of his eyes: "Why didn't you go in again? Don't you really want to see her?"
"I saw her... I can see..." Shen Kanyu murmured and repeated, but his hands were getting colder and colder.
"But she hasn't seen you yet, she misses her father very much," Gu Yansheng said gently, "I'll go in with you, don't be afraid."
He tried to pull Shen Kanyu into the door, but he managed to take two steps, then broke away tremblingly: "No... you can't go in... A Sheng, Tiantian doesn't like me, I can't go in, she is so happy now, look She'll annoy me."
Gu Yansheng's gentleness made him forget himself, he was no longer able to deceive himself as much as before, as long as he thought of his eyes that would become cold again in the future, he would feel so uncomfortable that his heart would almost burst.
Now it's too difficult for him to face Tiantian's annoyed and repelled appearance directly.
"I'll wait for you outside." He lowered his head and rubbed his eyes, took two steps back, and sat on the steps at the entrance of the restaurant, hugging his knees, staring at the concrete road in front of him in a daze.
—
Gu Yansheng was at a loss for a moment, he knew that Shen Kanyu was afraid of him, but he didn't know what was wrong with him that made him so cautious about his daughter who was born after ten months of pregnancy.
Tiantian said that the day her father left home, he walked around her all the time, but he never came to look for her. After a while, he went into the kitchen and made her a big bowl of egg yolks before talking to him. He also gave her a super beautiful safety lock, saying it was a birthday present from her father.
Gu Yansheng has never bought any security locks, and he has no habit of buying such things at all. The safety lock can only be bought by Shen Kanyu himself, but he dare not give it to the child in his name.
He didn't even dare to talk to the child directly, but first made a egg yolk boy to please him, because he felt that she didn't like him.
Gu Yansheng knew that although the methods were different, they both had the same love for Gu Yutian, even Shen Kanyu would be deeper than him. It's just because he doesn't see his daughter very often, so he dotes on him every time he gets along with her, so she will be more clingy to him, but it's impossible for Tiantian not to love her father because of this.
Although Shen Kanyu is really not very good at taking care of children.
He has several books related to parenting, which are full of dense notes. When Gu Yansheng came home late at night, he would often see him holding such a book in his arms, sitting on the floor and lying on the edge of his daughter's bed and fell asleep—no matter whether it was cold or hot in spring, summer, autumn and winter, he always sat on the floor and slept on the edge of the bed. There are more than half of the spacious beds on the sofa and the bed, and he has never been on it.
Hearing his footsteps, he would wake up quickly, get up from the ground in a hurry without opening his eyes, and vaguely say, Ah Sheng, you are back, you need to rest early, good night.
Once he was too sleepy and couldn't walk steadily, so he bumped into the door frame with a bang. Gu Yansheng felt a headache when he heard such a loud bang, and reached out to help him, but he was so scared that he became sober, and kept saying I'm sorry, next time I must walk well so that I won't bump into it again.
At that time, Gu Yansheng didn't know why he said sorry, but thinking about it now, he probably felt that he was making too much noise and was afraid of waking up the child.
—
Song Li knew that when he brought a child to read books, he had to sneer at him, and even took his books away angrily, telling him not to restrict the child's growth with these rules and regulations. He just scratched his head and smirked, picked it up silently and held it in his hands as a treasure.
At that time, Gu Yansheng didn't know what to do, and felt that his behavior was ridiculous and redundant, so he told him: If you don't know how to take it, don't take it, just let my mother do it.
Shen Kanyu carefully wiped off the dust on the book, and said: No need, Tiantian always cries in the middle of the night, and my aunt is getting old, I will work hard without her troubles.
Gu Yansheng smiled sarcastically, and said don't act like you.
He stared at him blankly, his eye sockets were reddened by the warm yellow light, he lowered his head and blinked quickly a few times, and said: No, I will try my best to take her well.
—
Shen Kanyu really worked hard and really raised her daughter well.
Gu Yansheng was busy with work. After Tiantian was born, he was basically taken care of by Shen Kanyu. He was not raised by his parents well, and he was blank in this regard. He could only use books and the Internet to explore, and brought Tiantian from babbling to toddler. I don't know how difficult it is, how much painstaking effort it took, how much love and sympathy I poured into the child in getting along day and night.
To put it bluntly, Gu Yutian was brought up by Shen Kanyu, and he, Gu Yansheng, was just a cheap father who would play with his children when he had free time.
Shen Kanyu should have been the person the child relied on the most, and the person who could enjoy the child's love most confidently, but in the end he only had the courage to look through the glass window.
Gu Yansheng really didn't know what happened between him and his daughter.
He tried to ask Gu Yutian, why do you think your father doesn't love you, the child wrung his fingers aggrievedly, and said that it was his father who sent him a few words.
He asked again, do you love Dad
She lowered her head and played with the toy in her hand in silence, unwilling to answer.
—
Gu Yansheng walked over and sat down beside Shen Kanyu.
Shen Kanyu was stunned for a moment, then propped up the steps and moved forward, trying to help him block the north wind howling from the corner.
"A Sheng, it's cold outside, go in quickly," he whispered hoarsely, "Go in... order a cup of hot tea to warm up."
"Is it cold?" Gu Yansheng didn't feel very cold, but when he heard Shen Kanyu say it was cold, he trembled inside, and quickly held his hand—it was as cold as ice.
Shen Kanyu was already wearing thick clothes, but he was still curled up, shivering from the cold from time to time, and his lips were frosty white.
"Come on, let's go inside first, instead of looking for Tiantian, let's find a corner and sit for a while." After Gu Yansheng finished speaking, he didn't give Shen Kanyu a chance to resist, and directly hugged him up.
Shen Kanyu was startled, grabbed the clothes on Gu Yansheng's chest, opened his eyes wide and wanted to speak, but his throat was choked up, and he didn't say a word.
"Be good and don't move around, be careful of the child." Gu Yansheng smiled softly at Shen Kanyu, and then watched him blushing and lowered his head contentedly, not daring to move.
Finding a remote corner in the restaurant, Gu Yansheng put Shen Kanyu down, and ordered a pot of red dates, wolfberry and longan tea.
The tea was served very hot, Gu Yansheng asked for another clean bowl, poured out some, stirred it with a spoon to cool down, and fed it to Shen Kanyu.
After drinking a few sips of hot tea, Gu Yansheng saw that Shen Kanyu regained his senses, reached out to help him wipe the tea stains from the corner of his mouth, and asked in a warm voice: "Can you tell me why you told Tiantian that you don't like her? I know you love her very much."
Shen Kanyu lowered his head and looked at the ground in a daze. He repeatedly grabbed the cloth on his knees with both hands, and raised his hand to rub his eyes from time to time—he had already developed a habit of feeling like he was going to cry, so he didn't care about it. It didn't flow out, so I directly reached out to wipe it off, afraid that Gu Yansheng would get bored if he saw it.
Seeing that he didn't say a word, Gu Yansheng sat there rubbing his eyes vigorously, blinking while rubbing, but his eye circles were still red and his eyelashes were wet, so he knew that he was feeling uncomfortable and desperately enduring it.
Obviously, I have told him many times that it's okay to cry in front of him, but he doesn't dare anymore.
Several times, he stood outside the ward and watched him sitting on the hospital bed, holding the mangosteen shell wrapped in a vacuum bag in his hand. fell out of his eyes.
He didn't cry, just sniffed his nose once in a while, then raised his sleeves to wipe off the tears all over his face, picked up the mangosteen shell, and kissed it almost reverently with his pale and chapped lips.
—
Gu Yansheng sighed, took his hand, pulled him into his arms, and gently rubbed the back of his head: "Don't be sad. Tell me, why did that girl Tiantian bully you?"
"No, it's not..." Sure enough, Gu Yansheng put the pot on Gu Yutian's head, and Shen Kanyu anxiously began to explain, "Tiantian is very good, she is really good, it's me, it's me, it's me I did wrong… "
"What did you do wrong?"
"I used to... I used to be really bad, and I didn't listen to you, so I did a lot of things wrong, which made you very angry, so..." Shen Kanyu spoke incoherently, expressing extremely chaotically, cold sweat broke out on the forehead, he raised his head and eyes were full Looking at Gu Yansheng earnestly, "So I, I want to correct it later. I want to listen to your words carefully... I know, I know you will let me go one day, I packed my things well, you let me go I can leave right away. But I'm afraid... I'm afraid that if Tiantian likes me, she will feel uncomfortable when I leave...so I... "
"So you just keep telling him that you don't like her, so that she doesn't like you either?" Gu Yansheng counted thousands of times, but he couldn't figure out his simple and strange thinking.
With red eyes, Shen Kanyu nodded vigorously.
He understands the pain of watching the person he loves turn and leave again and again.
When he was in school, he would often hold the hot egg yolk cake he just bought, and chase after his mother, wanting her to have a bite, but his mother was always too busy to look back at him, and would leave in a hurry. the door.
After getting married, he followed Ah Sheng step by step, wanted him to taste his new dishes, and wanted to tell him what funny and stupid things Tiantian did today. A Sheng was also very busy and often Without looking back, he left the house and closed the door.
He waited and waited every day, waiting for them to come back next time, to bring them better things, he didn't know when they would come back, at first he would pester them to ask non-stop, later he was afraid that they would be annoying , will not ask again, but always prepare what he thinks they might like, while waiting quietly, while imagining how happy they will be when they take the things, they are full of expectations for tomorrow, and then excitedly Smirking non-stop.
But when they came back, he could only see their backs. Day after day, year after year, he didn't know which time they turned around, maybe they would never come back.
He didn't want Tian Tian to suffer this feeling. Although he was probably being affectionate, Tian Tian probably didn't like him, but she didn't seem to hate him as much as others, so he was still afraid.
"Stupid or not?" Gu Yansheng pressed his head into his chest, not knowing whether to laugh or cry, and rubbed it gently, "How could it be possible for my own daughter not to like you because of your few words. You don't even know that you are not at home These days, she is arguing with me every day for her father, and I don't know where to find her."
"How could this be..." Shen Kanyu lowered his eyelashes and thought for a while, then murmured in a low voice, "She may be greedy for egg yolks again... I'll make it for her when I get back."
"Whether you want food or father, you'll know when you meet her." Gu Yansheng paused, then said softly and firmly, "And I won't let you go, don't worry about it anymore."
Shen Kanyu raised his head and stared at him blankly, as if he didn't understand what he said.
"What are you looking at me like that for?" Gu Yansheng smiled and brushed away his thin bangs covering his eyes, "Did you understand?"
"Ah... I understand, I know, thank you, Sheng!" Shen Kanyu responded hoarsely, with the corners of his eyes still wet, he grinned at Gu Yansheng and smiled gratefully.
He knew that A Sheng was referring to before the child was born, but A Sheng was kind-hearted by nature and couldn't bear to say it so bluntly. He had done so many bad things before, and A Sheng never had the heart to say something like driving him out of the house. talk. But he made the distinction very clearly, so he thought that he should be more sensible and prepare for everything in advance, and leave as soon as possible after the child is born, so as not to cause him any more trouble.
"Can we pass now? The little girl has been stretching her neck and looking around, I've seen it all..." Before Gu Yansheng finished speaking, he heard Gu Yutian's unique crisp, loud and milky voice behind him, Calling Dad sweetly, he felt the back of the person in his arms tremble slightly.
"Father, Father!!" The little girl was wrapped in a thick winter coat by her grandma, she was round like a ball, her hands and feet were clumsy, she was still flapping her short legs excitedly, she ran towards Shen Kanyu and shouted back at her grandma, "Grandma! I see my dad! That's my dad! It's my dad!"
Gu Yansheng saw her running crookedly, looking like she was about to fall in a second, and just about to remind her to slow down and not to rush, she saw her sprain her ankle and fell into the pile of stools next to her.
Before Gu Yansheng could react, Shen Kanyu had already rushed over, protecting his daughter's head, and took her into his arms.
He doesn't have much strength, he didn't even have the strength to pick up a spoon and drink a few sips of longan tea by himself just now, so he tried his last bit of strength to protect the child, but he couldn't hold on any longer, and fell to the ground and knocked crooked A few chairs.
He consciously protected the child in his belly, so he tried his best to support the ground with his hands, and he didn't fall particularly hard.
Gu Yansheng could see the blood flowing backwards all over his body, especially when he saw Gu Yutian who was frightened, with two bags of tears in his mouth, plunging into Shen Kanyu's arms and starting to cry, he felt his heart beating fast Stopped, reached out and grabbed her arm, and yelled in a low voice: "Gu Yutian, come out!!"
I've told her hundreds of times that my father can't be rude to him when he's sick, and this girl bumped into his arms like a cow as soon as she came up, making his chest hurt with anger.
Gu Yutian was already in shock, but when Gu Yansheng yelled at her again, she burst into tears in Shen Kanyu's arms, "Wow, dad, look! Daddy's fried chicken is fierce!! Kill me!! Don't you At home, my dad’s fried chicken is fierce!! Every day is so fierce!!! Dad, go home soon, woo woo woo woo woo woo!!!”
"Gu Yutian, do you want to be beaten—" Gu Yansheng was so angry that his face turned blue, but he still tried his best to control his volume, for fear that Shen Kanyu's heart would be hurt. Mingming also told her not to talk loudly to her father, but it was all in vain for her to howl like this to him.
Shen Kanyu was terrified by Gu Yansheng's actions, and hurriedly hugged the child tightly in his arms, begging in a hoarse voice, "A Sheng... don't scold her, don't beat her, she is afraid. I am the one who has no protection." Good for her, it's because I moved too slowly, it's because I'm not good... don't hit her. "
Gu Yansheng recovered from his rage, coughed twice, looked at Shen Kanyu and explained in embarrassment: "I'm afraid she will hurt you..."
"It's okay...it doesn't hurt, I'll hug her..." Shen Kanyu shook his head, his voice so weak that it was barely audible. Heart failure made it difficult for him to bear the child's sharp cries, and his breathing was even more difficult than before. He tried to adjust as many times before, and he breathed in the thin oxygen very hard but quietly.
Gu Yutian hurriedly hugged Shen Kanyu to rub her tears and snot, and said with a sob: "Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooodaddy, hug me."
"Hmm... Dad, don't be afraid, baby, don't cry..." Shen Kanyu smiled softly with a pale face, the tenderness and pity in his eyes seemed to come out from every inch of his bones, "Daddy is not fierce, he I'm just afraid that you will fall, he loves you very much... "
Finally, I really touched my biological father whom I haven't seen for a long time. Gu Yutian nestled in Shen Kanyu's arms, listening to him talking softly to herself, the little emotions that had been calm rose up again in an instant, and her nose was sore His eyes were hot, and the tears became more and more unstoppable.
She really missed her father, and was afraid that he would run away as soon as she let go. I don’t know why since I was a child, but my father was always by her side every day, but he didn’t want to hug her and kiss her as often as his father did, play with her toys, tell her stories, and would just sit by the side and ask her what she wanted. What, if she shakes her head, he will touch her head with a smile, then get up and leave.
She felt that her father loved her very much, but why did he seem to leave at any time.
She hugged Shen Kanyu desperately, tightly clutching the material of his clothes, like a koala, raised her face to look at him tearfully, and said pitifully, "Dad, Tiantian will never mess with egg yolk again."
After she finished speaking, she buried her face in Shen Kanyu's arms again, sobbing: "Tiantian misses daddy so much...don't mess with daddy anymore..."