He Xian still had a layer of sweet smell after the wedding on his body, which was a mixture of red wine, flowers and powder.
"I like you too much, what should I do?" Lin Sitao's question caught him off guard and made him feel a sharp pain. He hugged Lin Sitao and couldn't speak for a while. He couldn't promise Lin Sitao anything now. Promises are very simple, and when you say sweet words, you believe that it will last forever.
He still remembered the plans he and Song You had made for the future. Thinking about it now, it was so naive that it was a bit shameful. When Zhao Shuqing came, he would no longer talk about seclusion or traveling around the world. He just hoped that the two of them would be busy and support each other until retirement.
Now, for Lin Sitao, he doesn’t even dare to think about next year or the year after.
It turns out that loving someone without being hurt or hurting the other person is already so difficult.
Lin Sitao raised his head and looked at him, and He Xiancai joked: "It would be great if you were a little man the size of a thumb, so that I could put you in my pocket every day, take you everywhere, and be with you all the time."
Lin Sitao reached out and touched his face: "He Xian, I don't have to be by your side all the time..."
He couldn't speak.
He Xian probably knew what he wanted. He wanted to understand him and know his attitude and views on the things around him.
He said to Lin Sitao: "You can ask me anything you want."
Lin Sitao hesitated and asked, "You don't take me to meet relatives and friends. Do you have no confidence in me?"
He Xian laughed and said, "No." He repeated firmly, "No."
He said, "I'm afraid you'll regret it in the future, so take it slow."
Lin Sitao simply couldn't believe what He Xian was saying. He stood up and said, "Are you afraid that I will regret it? How is that possible?" He pressed on He Xian tightly and said, "You know, I have been chasing you for so long."
He Xian said: "So I can only ask you not to treat me as the finish line of the marathon."
Before you reach the end, that end may be the best dream in the world, and everything is for the sake of reaching it. But once you step past it, it loses most of its charm.
Lin Sitao was really a little angry. He Xian easily made him the one who was in the wrong, and quietly revealed that he had a lot of experience in love and had been hurt a lot.
He was even more angry that he still felt sorry for He Xian.
He Xian didn't let him go. He held his hand and asked, "Then again. Didn't you introduce me to your relatives and friends? Huh? When we went to J City during the Chinese New Year, you didn't introduce me to your grandparents, and I don't know any of your friends."
Lin Sitao said: "It's just a farce..."
"I didn't." He Xian blinked and kissed Lin Sitao's lips. They lay on the floor and did it sideways.
After they finished, they lay together for a while. Lin Sitao suddenly laughed out loud. He Xian asked him what he was laughing at.
Lin Sitao said: "I was wondering, if I ask Chen Yi out for dinner tomorrow and introduce you to her as my boyfriend, will she never talk to me again?"
He Xian also smiled: "Do you want to try it tomorrow?"
Lin Sitao shook his head.
He had to admit that there was some truth in He Xian's specious arguments.
"How did you come out?" Lin Sitao asked He Xian, "Or, do you think you've come out now?"
Lin Sitao had rarely thought about this before. If he hadn't met He Xian, this question would have been completely meaningless to him.
He Xian said, "This matter is quite complicated. Song You and I had a good relationship, you know. At that time, we were studying abroad and lived together. My family found out about it soon after. How should I put it? I didn't hide it on purpose. In the circle of international students, news spreads very quickly. At that time, several elders in my family flew over to persuade me to break up with Song You, and even took me to psychological treatment. At that time, they planned to suppress the impact of the matter to the minimum. As long as it didn't spread back to China, it wouldn't be a big deal."
Lin Sitao listened intently. He Xian paused for a moment, then dragged a blanket over to cover him and Lin Sitao.
"Song You was very simple at that time - in fact, he has always been a very simple person. If I didn't say break up, he wouldn't say break up. After returning to China, our relationship quickly became known to everyone around us, and with some exaggeration, it became like this - I didn't need to come out deliberately, people around me basically knew about it. Rumors followed me."
Lin Sitao recalled that even people like Wu Jianghai were talking about He Xian behind his back.
He Xian hugged Lin Sitao and said, "I'm used to rumors. But when I think about it now, it still feels bad. Can you bear it?"
Lin Sitao did not answer.
He Xian laughed again: "... Actually, when it comes down to it, I like men or women. What's there to talk about when I play some fancy tricks with the person I like in the room? Those who talk about me don't think they are prying into my privacy, but instead laugh at me for being perverted and stupid. It's really weird and funny."
He thought of Zhao Shuqing again. He covered his eyes and shook his head. Zhao Shuqing was someone he thought could fight this weirdness with him. They could live together normally and happily, and even small quarrels would be fun.
"Lin Sitao, I'm actually a weak person..." He Xian said.
Lin Sitao said: "That's great, I think I'm pretty strong."
He Xian really laughed this time: "That's great. The day I met you must be the luckiest day of my life."
They got up from the floor, took a shower together, and lingered in the bathroom for a while. He Xian asked Lin Sitao to stand in front of the mirror and climax with his reflection in the mirror. Lin Sitao's whole body was red, and he couldn't look at himself in the mirror at all, but he wanted to look at He Xian, so he could only glance at him hastily, not daring to stare at him. He Xian bit his ear from behind him, panting with a smile: "You... although you are strong, but... you are not thick enough... you still need to work harder."
The two of them worked on it for most of the night, luckily the next day was a day off.
Although He Xian did not introduce Lin Sitao to his family and friends, he let Lin Sitao meet two other people who were very important to him.
One was He Xian's driver, Master Xu. In fact, Lin Sitao and Master Xu had met several times before, and now He Xian formally talked to Master Xu. Master Xu was a taciturn man, and he looked very reliable.
The other was He Xian's secretary. Secretary Bai was in his early thirties, very neat and tidy. He handled many of He Xian's trivial matters. When he met Lin Sitao, he was like meeting an ordinary friend. They chatted about work casually without any personal topics. He just said, "Keep in touch with me. If you have any questions, you can come to me."
His attitude was so bland that Lin Sitao was a little confused.
He Xian assured Lin Sitao that Secretary Bai already understood their relationship.
Lin Sitao thought about it and understood - using such a low-key and reliable person is He Xian's style. He doesn't like people who make a fuss and announce his affairs to the whole world.