It is impossible for me to hear these few words of Zhao Yanyan, because I was already dead at that time, that is to say, hiccup.
When I woke up again, I found that I was standing in a large hall. It's like the palace hall in the palace drama of the Qing Dynasty that is often seen on TV, but it is a bit gloomy.
Directly in front of me, there was a very humorous old man sitting there who thought he was dignified, and beside him stood two people with even more uncanny looks who looked like judges. There is a large plaque directly above the three people, and there are three big characters written on it - the palace of the king of hell.
Khan, it can't be so funny, my first reaction is, is this a TV series? Looking at this scene, it is probably a ghost movie, but how do these three people look like a comedy movie? I can't help but sigh, these days, there are too many third-rate directors!
When I was thinking wildly, the funny old man in the middle slapped the table with beard and stare and shouted: "Who is down there? Why didn't you kneel down when you saw this King of Hades?"
I froze for a moment, feeling that I was regarded as an extra. I yelled, "Hey old man, are you looking for the wrong guy? I don't want to be on TV!"
The three people were taken aback when they heard what I said, Judge A next to him said to himself: "It's his grandma, there must be something wrong with this person's brain, right?"
Judge B also took out the book of life and death and searched, but after searching for a long time, nothing was found, so he said strangely: "No, there is no one who is about to die at this hour, who is the one below?"
The funny old man slapped the table again, and said: "The person below, you are dead! Report your name quickly, so that the King of Hades can arrange your reincarnation!"
I am dead? ? How did I die? Suddenly I remembered, yes, I am indeed dead. After I drank too much alcohol at Zhao Yanyan's wedding, the rescue failed, and then I came here.
It seemed that I was indeed dead. Damn, it's a real failure to be a human being in this life. In the first half of my life, I just struggled there, but in the end I died before I tasted the taste of love. At this time, I thought of a classic line in a very old movie: Once there was a sincere feeling in front of me, I didn’t cherish it, and I regretted it until I lost it. There is nothing more painful than this. If God can give me another chance, I will say three words "I love you" to that girl. If there is a time limit before this love, I hope it is: 10,000 years.
Just now that brother Hades seemed to tell me that I can still go to reincarnation? So I still have a chance to enjoy love, and I will never let go of any woman I love in my next life! I thought angrily.
So I said to Yan Wang: "Brother Yan Wang, my name is Liu Lei, you should quickly find a way to arrange my reincarnation!"
Yan Wang said angrily: "Get lost! Whose grandma belongs to your elder brother, I am older than your ancestors!"
Years of experience in shopping malls have taught me how to flatter and flatter. I know that if I want Hades to help me arrange reincarnation into a good family, this old man must flatter me. I said with a smile: "I mean, your brother looks young and radiant. If you don't mention your age, I definitely don't know how old you are! Look, when I came in just now, I thought it was a TV show, so I was thinking about it." , where did the director find such a handsome actor like you, he is even more handsome than Chow Yun-fat Andy Lau!" Speaking of this, I thought about it, and I guess that Andy Lau and Chow Yun-fat have not met Yan Wang before, so he said quickly: "Better than that The boy named Pan An is much more handsome!"
Hearing what I said, Yan Wang immediately smiled and turned his wrinkled old face to Judge A and asked, "Do I really look so young?"
Judge A was probably used to flattery, so he said without thinking, "Congratulations to Hades, congratulations to Hades, you are the best among ghosts, you are so handsome and invincible!"
King Yan laughed happily after hearing this, and said to me kindly: "What's your name? By the way, it's Liu Lei. You are my confidant! This king recognizes you as my brother! Brother, you Don't worry, I will definitely arrange a good family for you!"
I quickly thanked him, and my heart was full of joy, the trick succeeded!
Yama said to Judge B: "Hurry up and look up my brother's birth date!"
Judge B checked for a while, with an incredulous expression on his face, he said in surprise: "Yan Wang, look, your godbrother has a lifespan of 180 years, he can't die now!"
Hearing this, Yan Wang quickly took the book of life and death with a solemn expression, read it for a long time, slapped the table with gritted teeth, and shouted to the outside of the hall: "Damn it, which brat brought my brother back?"
After a while, a little ghost came in tremblingly, and fell to the ground as soon as he saw Hades: "Please calm down, little one, little one, I just pass by the hospital occasionally, look at this kid, no, it's your brother who is about to die." If he is dead, he will be captured and brought back!"
ah? When I heard that I was arrested by mistake, I was really speechless. I'm just so unlucky. I thought that such things as mistaken arrest would only happen in the yang world, but I didn't expect the officialdom in the underworld to be so dark.
Hades said angrily: "Fuck me, your eyes grow up and your butt is up? You are looking for trouble for me! It is clearly written in the book of life and death that my brother will be doomed, but he didn't say he will die! Somebody, put him Throw it into an oil pan and scald to death, and you will never be reborn!"
A few people with very strange looks... It should be the ghost who arrived in an instant and took the little ghost away.
I am not interested in the life and death of that little devil, I just want to reincarnate as soon as possible, I said to Hades: "Brother, can you arrange for my brother to be reincarnated first?"
Yan Wang said to me with a bitter face: "Brother, it's not that my brother won't arrange for you. It's just that you were caught by that idiot just before your life was over, so-ah, I can't help it!"
My heart was instantly cold, but I still asked unwillingly: "But I am not the only one who dies due to accidents every year, right? Then what should they do?"
The King of Hades replied: "Those people? They are all lonely ghosts wandering around in hell every day. When will they wait until their lifespan is exhausted before reincarnation!"
I still didn't give up: "Then since I was caught by mistake, can I send my soul back to my body?"
Yan Wang looked at me sympathetically and said, "Brother, I ask you, did you sign a post-death organ donation agreement when you were alive?"
I nodded and asked in confusion, "Why did you mention this all of a sudden?"
Yan Wang shook his head and said sympathetically, "I would really like to send you back, but now your heart, kidney and cornea have been replaced with someone else's body, and the rest of the corpse is probably practiced by medical students. …”
It seems that I am not ordinary unlucky! Am I destined to wander in hell for more than a hundred years
At this time, Judge B suddenly thought of something, and underestimated it for a long time while lying next to Hades' ear. Hearing this, Yan Wang slapped his thigh and shouted: "Yes! Grandma, why did I forget this? Brother, do you want to be born again?"
"Rebirth?" I said silently, I am no stranger to this word, in online novels, there are many such themes.
Yama thought I didn't understand, so he explained: "This rebirth is to let your soul return to your old body—"
I waved my hand and said, "I understand the meaning of rebirth. Doesn't that mean that all people who have not yet reached the end of their lives can choose to be reborn?"
Yan Wang shook his head and said: "That's not true, there is a quota for rebirth in our hell, and it has to be reported to the Heavenly Court for approval. Originally, I wanted to sell this quota to a high price, but since you are my brother, I will I’m giving this spot to you! Anyway, I’m not short of money.”
It seems that this quota is quite precious! It seems that I am really right about the old brother Yan Wang! I have heard that people who are reborn have some supernatural powers, can I have them too? So I asked with a thick face: "Brother, will I have some special abilities after I am reborn?"
"Well," Hades thought for a while and said, "I don't have the right to decide. If you really want to have supernatural powers, I can help you apply with the higher authorities, but the time may be longer!"
As soon as I heard there was a door, I immediately asked, "How long?"
Yan Wang thought for a while and said: "This is not sure, it may be a day, it may be a year, the application for supernatural powers of the person who was reborn in the last session was just approved yesterday, I guess it will be faster this time, it will only be a few hundred years! "
I am dizzy, hundreds of years? I quickly asked: "Then did this person have a supernatural power later?"
Yan Wang said: "Have a fart, that person's great-grandson is dead now, and he is still depressed all his life. Before he died, he shouted 'When will my great-grandfather have supernatural powers'!"
When I heard this, I almost fainted on the ground, I think I'd better forget it. So I waved my hand and said, "Brother, I'll just do it this way, if the ability works, it's fine, if it doesn't work, forget it!"
Yan Wang smiled slightly: "But I can give you a mobile phone, and if you need anything in the future, you can call me anytime!"
cell phone? I asked, "Can I call you when I return to Yangjian?"
Yan Wang nodded affirmatively: "Of course, this is just developed by Edison and Bell. Oh, I forgot to tell you that Edison is currently the chief scientist of our Yan Wang Technology Co., Ltd."
Judge B came over and handed me an exquisite jade pendant, I wondered, "Can this thing make a phone call?"
Yan Wang proudly said: "Of course, direct telepathy, when you miss me, you can make friends with my brother and me. The product for you is the latest generation, which uses high-efficiency energy from the dark night, which is the same as the solar energy in your Yangjian. This only needs to be released It can automatically replenish energy in dark places."
I tentatively believed in this new type of mobile phone that Brother Yan Wang and I boasted about, and carefully hung it around my neck.
Yan Wang said to me: "Okay, the time is almost up, first judge, you go and send my brother back."
I rolled my eyes, and this guy was really called Judge A.