Waiting For You Online

Chapter 137: The future is bleak

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That night, He Jin went to the high-speed rail station with his father. In September, the weather had turned cold. He Jin remembered that there was a change of clothes at home, and he didn't go back to the rental house he and Qin Yang shared. He just called Qin Yang before leaving. Telephone.

After Qin Yang signed a contract with an entertainment company, he just received a few print advertisements. He has been busy filming for the past two days and asked for leave from school. He hasn't returned home yet. When He Jin said he was going back to Q City, he suddenly became nervous: " Why go back? What happened?"

"My mother is not in good health. My father came to see me." He Jin didn't want Qin Yang to worry, so he only mentioned this sentence. When he was on the phone, he was already at the high-speed rail station, and his father was smoking not far away. He Jin He spoke very softly, not daring to let his father hear him.

Qin Yang didn't have much affection for this "mother-in-law" who threw He Jin's helmet and left a scar on He Jin's back. Subconsciously, he was also afraid that this big boss would affect his relationship with He Jin, so he couldn't help but said: "The body is not very good. Okay? It’s not a lie to you, is it?”

He Jin was angry: "Qin Yang, this kind of thing can't be used as a joke!" He was already confused enough, Qin Yang still said such things...

When Qin Yang heard He Jin's tone, he also felt that he had said something wrong, so he hurriedly said, "I'm sorry, I'm afraid that you will be wronged again when you go back."

He Jin sighed. He didn't have the heart to explain anything to Qin Yang before he understood the specific situation.

"When will you come back?" Qin Yang was more concerned about this question, but unfortunately he was working now and couldn't fly, otherwise he would have desperately wanted to go back with He Jin.

"I guess I'll be back in a day or two. I'll go see my mother. I still have two months to go to class. I have to choose a topic for my graduation thesis. I can't miss class for too long. Don't worry."

As long as he will come back, Qin Yang's heart sank, he didn't know what he was worried about, maybe he was bitten by a snake once, and he was always afraid of the recurrence of the "abandoned" incident nine years ago.

"Then remember, no matter what happens, you must call me as soon as possible. Auntie is not in good health and needs to see a doctor or something. You can choose the right one. Don't think about financial matters first. I have it." Qin Yang exhorted.

This sentence finally made a decent point, He Jin's heart warmed, and he said "OK", seeing his father smoking a cigarette while looking in his direction, he quickly hung up the phone.

After the rendezvous, the father and son remained silent. Father He was a little relieved by He Jin's cooperation, but He Jin seemed to have never intended to mention the boy who lived with him. This matter still made Father He angry and puzzled.

"Did you call that boy just now?" Father He asked softly.

He Jin said "hmm", his father knew about it, and he didn't have much point in hiding it.

Father He took one last puff of cigarette, pinched the cigarette butt, and said with a vicissitudes of life: "He Jin, Dad can try to understand you in everything, but this is the only thing that can't."

His father's firm look of "my attitude is here" made He Jin feel sour.

Indeed, the truth of the past is regrettable and shocking, and the mother's illness seems reasonable, but He Jin, who lacks understanding of "depression", has not yet realized how serious the disease is. "Depression, depression", He Jin always feels It was a kind of emotional illness, as long as I went back to apologize to her mother, reconcile, and take care of his mother's emotions, everything would get better.

But he still doesn't intend to compromise on this. He has already tasted the taste of freedom. It is hard for He Jin to imagine himself living under his mother's control, and he doesn't want to meet his mother's expectations because of this illness. He plans to wait for his mother to get better. It's time for a son, and then slowly fight a protracted war with your parents.

"After you graduate, you can do the job you want, or you can find the girl you like. This dad supports you, but you don't want to be an abnormal person." Father He is still trying to persuade He Jin" Get back on track."

He Jin raised his hand to cover his face, and said in pain, "Dad, stop talking."

He was reluctant to part with Qin Yang, half a month ago he had dinner at Qin Yang's house, Qin's father even begged himself not to hurt Qin Yang's heart... Why is there such a big difference in tolerance between families

Returning to the home where he had been away for a long time, He Jin felt as if he had passed away. The home was still filled with that familiar smell, but it was less warm and more lifeless. There were some medicine bottles with their labels torn off on the dining room table. , He Jin glanced at it, and there were more than ten kinds.

He Jin's aunt came out of the master bedroom when she heard the sound. She exclaimed in a low voice, "Why did you come back so soon!"

"Well," He Jin looked towards the bedroom: "Auntie, where's Mom?"

My aunt looked at Father He, and Father He nodded: "I told him all about it."

Pointing to her brain, the aunt said in a dazed voice, "I fell asleep, after taking that medicine, I became lethargic, and I spent less time waking up during the day."

Father He put down his things and sighed: "It's better to fall asleep, it's better than being awake looking for life and death."

My aunt looked at He Jin: "Jin Jin, your mother is not easy, you have to understand her."

He Jin: "..."

Father He waved his hand, and said to Aunt He Jin, "We've been on the bus all night, and it's midnight. Let's go to bed first. We'll talk about it tomorrow if we have anything to do. I'll squeeze with He Jin, and you'll still be with your sister."

He Jin was lying on the bed, tossing and turning, his aunt's eyes and tone of voice seemed to be talking about a "crazy disease". He really didn't expect it to be so serious.

He Jin checked it online with his wristband. If he didn't check it, he wouldn't know. It turned out that his understanding of "depression" was too shallow at the beginning.

Depression is not "overwhelmed", nor "emotional", let alone "pessimistic loss" and "hypocritical", but changes in brain function. It is the "serotonin", "serotonin" and " The concentration of substances such as "norepinephrine" and "dopamine" has changed. In short, the function of managing emotions is broken.

If you are sick, you need to take medicine, and you will look normal after taking medicine. Otherwise, the patient will be in a "dark and hopeless" mood for a long time, with no interest in life. This is the most fundamental reason for suicidal tendencies. After reading a bunch of explanations , He Jin's mood suddenly became heavy.

The next day, He Jin was awakened by a gentle touch. For a moment, he thought he was in a rental house in City A, and it was Qin Yang who was kissing him. He rubbed his hand comfortably, but soon Respond, he went home!

Opening his eyes, He Jin saw a gloomy face, it was his mother.

"Mom..." He Jin sat up quickly, looking at the obvious wrinkles on her face and the half-white hair in disbelief. He remembered that he hadn't had it when he left. Obviously, she was much older, although It's only been half a year, but He Jin doesn't know how much psychological pressure she has endured.

All of a sudden, He Jin felt very guilty and blamed himself, his heart was throbbing, he grabbed the quilt and said in a low voice: "Mom, I'm sorry, I was wrong."

The woman had a sad face, looked at him carefully, and touched his face: "It's good to be back, it's good to be back, I haven't seen you for half a year, I miss you so much, and there is something wrong with my mother, so I apologize to you."

He Jin's eyes were sour. This is the understanding and respect he wanted, and the peaceful coexistence he wanted. He grabbed his fucking hand and apologized: "Don't touch it, I'm here, I'm fine."

The woman was still staring at him and asked him about the details of the past six months. He Jin felt guilty and didn't dare to mention the matter between himself and Qin Yang in front of his mother. Later, when school started, he lied that he had been working outside for half a year. His mother burst into tears and apologized to him repeatedly, saying that he had suffered a lot.

He Jin didn't know how to lie, he just wanted to be able to lie once, and he didn't see anything different about his mother for the time being. He Jin was quite optimistic, and his father was very happy to find He Jin back. effect,

But He Jin's optimism didn't last long, and he soon witnessed a fucking "sickness".

It was dinner at night. He Jin mentioned his summer internship experience, and carefully proposed his intention to stay and work in City A after graduation. "No", she spoke very fast, just like every time she rejected He Jin's request in the past, she couldn't get in the way at all. Afterwards, she stared blankly at one place, as if talking to herself, In the end, she started to cry, crying and saying: "How can you treat me like this, how can you be so cruel and unfilial! I am your mother! I am your mother! If you leave me! What is the meaning of my life?" , I might as well die!"

He Jin couldn't understand why the topic got to this point, and he didn't know how to deal with this situation. His father was eager to wink at him and ask him to persuade him. He Jin could only promise against his will, "I won't go", "I will Come back", "Mom, don't cry", after persuasion for a long time, his mother still looked unlovable, and finally she was coaxed and given medicine by his father, and then slowly calmed down.

Only then did He Jin realize that he was too naive and too idealistic.

Because he still had to go to school, he couldn’t do without going. After apparently resolving the conflict with his mother, He Jin took the high-speed train back, and promised to make a video call once a week in the following days to report the details of life. Everything seemed to be back to the past. .

After returning home, He Jin felt as if he had been infected, and he was completely depressed and pessimistic. In this situation, he found that the future of himself and Qin Yang was bleak.

On the day of returning to school, He Jin didn't know what happened, but instead of going to the house rented with Qin Yang, he returned to the dormitory for one night.

Hou Dongyan asked him how the matter was handled, and He Jin said, "It's worse than I imagined." He didn't tell Qin Yang that his mother had depression, but told Hou Dongyan, "I took a lot of medicines, but I checked, then The side effects of the medicine are quite serious, and taking too much is bad for your health, so now my dad and my aunt are taking care of it.”

Hou Dongyan asked: "What about you and Qin Yang?"

He Jin should have been firm, but at this moment, he hesitated: "I don't know..."

Hou Dongyan: "Hey, according to me, you can just play in the game, and it's too unreliable to have a few couples who can achieve real results in real life."

That's right, He Jin thought the same way before, two men, the reality is so difficult, how could they go on? But after being with Qin Yang, he was unconsciously infected by the other party's enthusiasm and love. He liked the feeling of being surrounded by positive energy and self-confidence when staying with Qin Yang.

"I read a book that says that all those loves and loves are caused by dopamine. No matter men or women, they must be dizzy during the passionate love period. After that stage, calm down, you will find that in fact, no one leaves. Don't open anyone."

Hou Dongyan was just objectively analyzing from He Jin's point of view what to do to benefit him, but he never expected that his casual words would have a huge impact on He Jin.

He Jin felt that what he said was right. From the beginning of the eight-year wait, he felt that Qin Yang's feelings for him were very unreasonable. He thought, maybe Qin Yang's pursuit of him was just a momentary obsession, maybe Qin Yang... didn't like it that much. Own.