I numb myself with a lot of work every day. My colleagues around me laugh at me, asking why I have to work so hard when I have a boyfriend as rich as Ji Guanxin. I just laugh and say nothing every time.
God knows that I have done something wrong. Only in this way can I feel more at ease in my heart.
Luo Xiangdong said that Kuang Yiyang didn't want to see me appear with him. I guess Kuang Yiyang didn't want to see me either. But I didn’t expect that one day I picked up the group and when I took the list and called the names one by one, I would see Kuang Yiyang at the end of the line.
He was wearing a light blue denim jacket with a fur collar, light-colored casual pants, and white sneakers, exactly as I remembered him. For a moment, I thought that nothing had changed between us. I could still greet him happily when I saw him, and then he responded to me enthusiastically by saying "senpai".
But when he saw me, there was no expression on his handsome face. It had been half a month since the last Fengning nightclub incident. Most of the bruises on his face had receded, but when he looked closer, some traces could still be seen.
Our eyes met. I was shocked, but he was cold.
He just looked at me lightly and said nothing.
I had a lot to say to him, but I was at work and had to officially lead a group tour after I called my name, so I never got around to it.
During lunch, I came to Kuang Yiyang. Just as I was about to call his name, he immediately stood up and left the dining room. I followed him to the security door and found him taking out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket.
He frowned, he didn't smoke before.
I suddenly thought about his drug use and felt disgusted, so I immediately walked up to him, grabbed the cigarette from his hand, and said, "Don't you want to stop thinking about it?"
Kuang Yiyang held a lighter in one hand, lowered his eyes slightly, and his long eyelashes were long and curled.
After a while, he raised his eyelids, opened his lips, and said, "My brother-in-law also smokes."
Hearing this, I couldn't help but change my face.
Kuang Yiyang looked at me with interest and said, "What do you like about my uncle? I guess you don't like his money, but you like him as a person."
"He has many women. He smokes and drinks. I always advise him to find a girlfriend and have a good relationship, but he always says that we are not the same person."
Kuang Yiyang's voice was not loud, even very soft, but it felt like a heavy stone was pressing on my heart, so heavy that I could hardly breathe.
After a pause, he continued: "After I found out that you two were together, I kept thinking about what you like about my brother-in-law. Then I figured it out. It turns out that women like bad men."
Kuang Yiyang said it was calm and gentle, but my heart felt like it was being cut by a knife.
As if something was stuck in my throat, I really wanted to say something, but in fact I found that I couldn't say anything. I really wanted to cry, but I secretly held it back until my eyes turned red.
Kuang Yiyang kept looking at me without changing his expression. Seeing that I was silent, he asked, "We haven't seen you for such a long time. Don't you have anything to say to me?"
I had kept my lips tightly pursed before, but now that I heard these words, I opened my mouth and said out loud: "Yi Yang, I'm sorry."
As he spoke, a large tear fell down.
Kuang Yiyang raised his hand and reached for my face. I instinctively looked away, and his hand stopped less than five centimeters in front of me.
My heart suddenly trembled, for fear of irritating him.
But Kuang Yiyang just raised the corners of his lips with a slight irony and said, "I forgot that you don't like me, so you don't even care about me wiping away your tears."
The sourness in my heart was about to overflow, and I finally couldn't help but say: "Yi Yang, if you are angry in your heart, you can scold me or even hit me. Don't abuse yourself like this..."
Kuang Yiyang's handsome face showed a bit of indifference, and he smiled and said, "Did I abuse myself?"
I didn't say anything, and he rolled his eyes slightly, then looked as if he was suddenly enlightened, and said, "Oh, I remembered, you're talking about what happened in the nightclub restroom last time, right?"
"Oh, I like her, and she likes me too. We are very happy together."
If I see Kuang Yiyang again, I would expect him to scold me, tease me, or even ignore me, but he is like this now... I can't accept it at all.
I really treat him like my own brother, so seeing him forcing a smile now makes me feel like my heart is cut by a knife.
"Yi Yang, I was wrong. Is it all my fault? I swear that I will never be with your brother-in-law in this life. Can you be okay?"
I am really at a loss, even if I beg him, as long as he can get back on track.
When I mentioned Luo Xiangdong, the smile on Kuang Yiyang's face faded inch by inch, and finally became gloomy.
After staring into my eyes for a long time, he said aloud: "Is it because of me that you and your brother-in-law can't get together?"
“…”
"It seems I was redundant and delayed you two."
The more he talked, the worse his face became. I was afraid of irritating him and making him do something extreme again, so I quickly said: "Yi Yang, if I knew that Luo Xiangdong was your uncle, I would not have any objection to him." think."
Kuang Yiyang said: "Then you blame me for hiding it from you?"
My heart was very tired and I could only shake my head.
Kuang Yiyang added: "You failed to be with my brother-in-law and turned around to follow Ji Guanxin, so you can love anyone but not me?"
"I… "
"I know, it's not that I'm not as good to you as they are to you, it's just because you like bad men, you don't care how many women they have been around, and you don't care whether they really love you, so I became like them, you Will you also fall in love with me?"
Kuang Yiyang frowned, narrowed his eyes slightly, and asked me in an almost forced manner.
Invisible pressure hit me. One side of me felt guilty, but the other side was filled with anger, so I didn’t think much about anything else. I just said back to him: "Yi Yang, I really don’t love you. Even without Luo Xiangdong, I won’t be with you either.”
The slight curve of Kuang Yi's eyelashes told me that he must be angry and hateful inside.
But I just wanted to end this debt as soon as possible, so I continued: "Don't become bad, and never give up the good and kind parts of yourself for anyone or anything. I don't love you, but I I really feel sorry for you and treat you like my own brother. Do you really want to force me to feel guilty for the rest of my life? "
Kuang Yiyang's eyes were filled with redness. After a while, he whispered: "If this can make you remember me forever, then I will admit it."
I frowned and said, "Yi Yang, do you understand? I..."
"I don't understand!" Kuang Yiyang suddenly interrupted me loudly.
He stared at me and said: "I don't understand, I don't understand why I have loved you for four years and guarded you for four years. It was obviously me who met you first. I met you one step earlier than everyone else! It was me. Not good enough for you? Or is there something you want that I can’t give you? Why can you like so many people but not me?”
Kuang Yiyang's whole body was tense, and he was so angry that the fingertips of his hands hanging by his sides were trembling.
At this point, I just risked my life and had a showdown with him: "Whether you like someone depends on how you feel, and whether you can be with someone depends on fate. But I have no feelings for you, and I have no fate."
Sometimes, the more hurtful the words are, the more they can make a person sober.
Just like Luo Xiangdong treated me back then, if he hadn't been so cruel, maybe I wouldn't have left so freely.
When Kuang Yiyang heard this, he remained silent for a long time. I don’t know how long it took, but when I tried to persuade him not to be decadent anymore, he suddenly turned around and opened the safety door, preparing to go out.
I subconsciously shouted: "Yi Yang..."
Kuang Yi raised his head and said without looking back: "Since you can't love me, just leave me alone in the future!"
I didn't catch up with him because of his current state. Even if I caught up with him, it would be useless to say anything.
His appearance made me distracted all day, and I didn't hear what the tourists said several times.
After finally making it to the end of the day, I received a call from Luo Xiangdong.
Logically speaking, I wouldn't answer the call, but thinking about the scene where Kuang Yiyang left angrily during the day, I was worried that something was wrong with him, so I still answered the call.
Sure enough, the first thing Luo Xiangdong said was: "Has Yi Yang been looking for you?"
I said 'hmm'.
Luo Xiangdong said in a deep voice: "What did you say to him?"
I said, "I don't love him. Please don't kidnap me morally in this way in the future."
In fact, what I said was not so straightforward. I have always cared about Kuang Yiyang and didn't want to make him sad. But Luo Xiangdong called me to ask about the matter between Kuang Yiyang and me, but I was not calm and always wanted to poke him a few times.
When I finished speaking, Luo Xiangdong's voice became even deeper, mixed with the anger that he couldn't hide. He said: "Liang Zijin, I don't care with you about why Yi Yang became like this, but can you see that he once treated you For the sake of kindness, don’t break his heart again?”
My voice became shrill and I choked: "One slap can't make a difference. It's you uncle and nephew who treated me like a fool. If you had told me the truth, would things have turned out like this?"
I was also driven crazy by this tight emotion, and many words hurt people as soon as I said them.
Luo Xiangdong said in a deep voice: "Yi Yang helped you with good intentions, but he helped you wrongly? Are you a white-eyed wolf?"
I said: "I am a white-eyed wolf, so who are you? You know why Yi Yang arranged for me to be with you, so what are you worried about? You want to rob your nephew... "
Before I finished speaking, Luo Xiangdong had already hung up.
I stood behind the unmanned security door with my cell phone in hand, and suddenly cried in grievance.
I don't know what to do, I try so hard to make everyone happy, but in the end everyone blames me.
At this point, I can no longer tell whose fault it is. If I could bear the fault and everything could be settled, I would.
Kuang Yiyang regards me as a scheming bitch who seduces his uncle, and Luo Xiangdong thinks that I am a supercilious wolf who disregards friendship and hurts Kuang Yiyang. I am not a human being between them, not to mention that I am still with Ji Guanxin. If Ji Guanxin knew...
I dare not think about it.