I want to refund the ticket, but Qianqian will definitely not let me...
So, it seems that today I have to enjoy the historical drama that this girl graffitied.
But look at the crowds of spectators around you, these unlucky people who were fooled by the gimmicks such as "The Imperial Mother wrote and directed, Azeroth Salvation Army senior generals starred in friendship, adapted from the most touching fairy tale in human history" , Thinking about how many people buried me with me today, I suddenly felt that everything was not so bad.
At worst, the scene of enjoying the foaming around the mouth can be regarded as today's main drama.
While thinking wildly in my mind, a soft sound of a harp suddenly came from behind the empty stage, and the scene where there was still a little chatter immediately fell silent, and with the activation of the sound insulation force field, the open-air theater was instantly silent.
Only the faint sound of the harp became clearer and clearer, as if it came from all directions, gradually filling the ears of the listener.
I was waiting for Snow White to rush onto the stage riding a Dodge Tomahawk and wearing a mobile armor, shouting mourning Samus, and I was stunned.
Such a beautiful music appeared at the beginning of the stage play written by Qianqian, this... Is my family Qianqian's brain functioning normally this time
"Ding dong, ding dong", the melodious and melodious harp fragments gradually rose up, and finally became an ethereal music that echoed softly over the entire theater, and at the same time, the curtain on the stage finally slowly opened , Immediately, soft exclamations sounded all around.
Water Cube... Ahem, considering copyright issues, it's better not to use this image.
A square of crystal water appeared on the stage, which was obviously bound by magic power, because I found that there was no glass outside the square "water block", and seaweed was arranged at the bottom of this water body , shells, and gravel are obviously simulating the scene at the bottom of the sea, and in the center of this beautiful magical water, a beautiful figure playing a harp just rightly casts a stunning view to the audience as the curtain opens. a glance.
The narration begins: "It is said that in the depths of the endless blue ocean, there is a beautiful and kind creature living. Under the calm moon, the lucky crew saw this beautiful creature taking a nap on the reef, so they fell in love with it. Intoxication—they call this beautiful creature a mermaid, and our protagonist is such a mermaid princess... "
I saw this silently, turned to Qianqian, with tears in my eyes: "Is Snow White swollen?"
Although I know that the script you wrote will have to digress sooner or later, but I never thought that you missed the topic in the first minute, girl! Although I know that Isana plays well with you, please at least think about the basic logic when writing the script, hey! Snow White has a dime relationship with that silly saltwater fish
Qian Qian glared at me silly, completely unaware of what was going on, and then continued to watch the show with her head turned.
No matter what the script is, Isana on the stage is still very dedicated, and she seems to be very involved in the show: this is also a true performance, after all, she is the princess of the mermaid clan, so if she is cheating, she will be cheating, at worst, I will treat it as a sea. Daughter look!
But this beautiful thought came to an abrupt end the moment Isana got up and turned off the player under the harp.
... Director, I demand that the show manager be killed!
"Princess Mermaid is the youngest daughter of the Mermaid King, and also the most well-behaved daughter," the narration, which sounded half soft, continued to read in a tone like plain water, "but she is not loved by her family. , on the contrary, her academic performance is poor, her sports are not good, she is dissuaded from special classes, and the mermaid princess who even needs a player to play the harp is often dismissed by her brothers, sisters and stepmother at home. The mermaid king thinks that such a daughter will definitely grow up I can't find a good job, and I don't even feed the poor little princess. The mermaid princess is a nobleman in the sea, but she lives like a poor poor... "
Isana flicked her tail at the right time, flattened the passing shrimps, grabbed them and stuffed them into her mouth.
“…the hungry little princess even had to practice her predation skills…”
Indistinct sobs sounded from the audience, but I don't think you guys are so moved like this.
Anyway, I am desperate for this too realistic cheating script, completely desperate!
"Because there is no oxygen in the seabed, according to the third natural paragraph on page 17 of the fourth volume of junior high school physics, two of the three elements of the combustion phenomenon are missing, and the mermaid princess who cannot cook can only eat raw food. She suffered from a variety of gastrointestinal diseases early on, such as duodenal ulcer and chronic gastritis, years of unbalanced diet and vitamin B deficiency also made her suffer from bleeding gums... "
It was too early to be desperate just now, is it okay to despair again now? Qianqian, have all the things you memorized during the entire compulsory education period been condensed into this script
"Until one day, the prince came." When I was complaining, the narrator suddenly said-this prince really just jumped up for the plot.
The magic water on the stage occupies a very large area, and one end of it is even directly connected to the part of the stage narrator covered by the curtain. At first I thought it was a channel for water injection, but only now did I realize that it turned out to be a river channel.
In the resonant fisherman's song, our prince came out from behind the stage in a rubber boat. His highness was wearing a big bamboo hat and carrying a fishing rod...
I can't even imagine the cheating scene below, but the cheating prince still unswervingly cast his rod on Isana.
"His Royal Highness, who came to the sea to fish and relax, sprinkled the bait, and the hungry and cold mermaid princess couldn't stand the hunger, so she swallowed the bait in one gulp."
director! I want to learn to fish! I want to learn to fish for girls! Did the mermaid princess get caught after messing around for a long time
The prince who always wears a bamboo hat on the stage has now started to show his face for the first time since acting: After Isana was pulled up by the fishing line, His Royal Highness took off the bamboo hat, and I gasped: Kael'thas! Don't you have anything else to do
"Oh, it's a pity it's not a fish."
The prince on the stage met the eyes of the fished mermaid princess for a while, the former shook his head regretfully, then let go, and the mermaid princess fell back with a plop.
The audience in the audience was almost outraged: idiot! Don't give it to me!
Monina, who was sitting in the back, couldn't bear it at this moment, she leaned over and muttered: "If I were a prince, I would definitely put it back and be born again."
Oh oh oh, it appeared again, Monina's tough speech!
What I can't understand is that the script has reached this point, and the narration is still calm when read aloud: "After the prince left, the mermaid princess fell into lovesickness. She was the first to give herself food and after she caught herself The man who chooses to release life is obsessed with it, but she knows that she cannot fall in love with a human being: it is too strenuous for the fish tail to jump on the ground.
But the princess who couldn't stand the pain of lovesickness knew that there was someone who could help her, and that was the old witch outside the palace. The witch can make a magical medicine, and after taking this medicine, the mermaids can get rid of the shackles of Grandpa Darwin and become people walking on the ground.
But the old witch is very greedy. The old woman asked the mermaid princess to use her voice or the property of the whole kingdom in exchange for this medicine. She still made her own choice. On a dark and stormy night, the little princess killed the Mermaid King, her stepmother, seventeen brothers and sisters, and more than one hundred relatives from the seven aunts and eight aunts of the family. All the treasures were stolen..."
At this moment, the entire auditorium was silent, and I was dumbfounded listening to the narration, sweating profusely: This must be written when Qian Qian’s personality changed!
"But what makes the princess sad is that the witch who can make the magic medicine was scared to death in the process."
The audience continued to be silent.
"The little princess had to drink all the potions in the old witch's laboratory, trying to find a way to become a human..."
Princess you massive!
"Fortunately, the little princess made it! She got both legs!"
The Water Cube on the stage disappeared instantly in a burst of space-transmitted light, and Isana, who had just completed self-destruction and drank thousands of cups, disappeared from the audience's sight, replaced by someone standing there Princess with legs: Jaina.
I said, you really have nothing to do! Come to join in the excitement of Qianqian's cheating script
"The reborn mermaid princess was overjoyed. She decided to make a clean break with her old life, so she gave herself a new name, called Snow White—my mother, it can be regarded as going back... Ah, sorry, sorry, this sentence is not In the narration!"
The audience: "..."
I:"… "
I really didn't expect Qianqian to remember this! Also, the narration is so cute.
The plot has progressed here, and it has completely transformed into a cheating route. The newly born Snow White walks on the earth, successfully learns the human way of life, and finds out where the castle where the prince lives is. On the way, Snow White encountered many difficulties and obstacles. There were lions, snakes, and goshawks who wanted to attack the princess. Of course, the weak princess was no match for these beasts—I don’t believe it anyway—at a very critical moment, seven aliens The brave warrior appeared and rescued Princess M who was in distress.
Those are seven kind dwarfs, seven industrious dwarves, seven dwarfs who collect ore for a living and get along with the animals in the forest friendly, seven...
The seven, headed by Magni Bronzebeard, have muscles rounder than their foreheads, covered with steel plates as thick as tank armor, with a mountain ax in one hand and a ground hammer in the other, and they act like a group of big iron blocks that can move. Just smashed a dozen dwarves flying lions.
...Bai Xueji, are you going to form the Black Coast Seven Dragons Gang
In the suddenly impassioned march, Jaina on the stage led Ironforge to smash, smash, loot and burn the group of seven to embark on a vigorous adventure. Now I have no hope for the plot at all, but it seems that all the above are regarded as It’s okay to watch a martial arts movie: Magni, wielding the King of the Hill suit, raised his hammer and fell, smashing into the air lions, tyrannosaurs, mammoths and fin whales made with golem technology, and Snow White’s hands Lightning whirled and swept across the intercepting force sent by a vicious queen with serious child fetishes in the castle. The other six dwarfs roared loudly and wiped out Grandma Wolf, the North Wind Witch, and the Ice Queen successively. , Anubis, Grass Mud Horse, Doctor Octopus, and so on. There are 18 waves of mixed troops composed of villains. Bai Xueji, who received the Iron Cross, led her dwarf army to fight north and south, opened up borders, and quickly captured the prince's country. They formed a joint army with the oppressed Vikings and Pac-Man in nearby countries, and fought with The evil queen's final battle on the plain before the castle
It was an extremely tragic battle. During the battle, four of the dwarves unfortunately died in battle, so the remaining three, with tears of grief in their eyes, all replaced with muskets at the suggestion of the dwarf leader Magni, and changed the name of the gang from black to black. The Coastal Seven Dragons became the Three Musketeers...
"Brian, my kind little dwarf, what shall we do now?"
On the stage, Snow White, who was at a disadvantage, leaned on her long sword wearily, and looked forward with firm eyes.
"Please don't be discouraged, Your Royal Highness," Dwarf No. 3, who has been converted to a musketeer, replied gruffly, "Please look at the battle map. This battlefield is suitable for us to attack from the front. It has only three main attack routes now, and It's difficult to take care of each other. My senior brother and my second senior brother and I went to open the way. The enemy must not be able to stop them all. You see, this is the top lane, this is the middle lane, and this is the bottom lane... Our goal is to stand here. The queen, but on the way Killing minions is a problem - we don't have enough manpower, and I don't know if there are any arresting skills on the queen's side... "
This is the story of Tang Seng leading three musketeers to play D, right
The narration begins: "After a difficult battle, Her Royal Highness and the three apprentices finally defeated ninety-nine eighty-one demons and came before the evil queen."
"Bang~!~!" In the big decisive battle, which was obviously rushed out by the writer who couldn't make it up, after a puff of smoke, the evil queen appeared in full body—Sylvanas! ! Go home and fix your elevator for me!
"Evil queen!" Magni held a hammer in his hand, and made a fierce look at Cirvanas, who was playing the role of queen, and looked helplessly at the audience, "You have to fight for your elevator...cough, for You pay the price for the atrocities committed against my five brothers!"
Brian next to him hurriedly reminded in a low voice: "Brother, there are four—I'm still alive!"
"But I fell five times!" Magni yelled, raising his voice.
The audience was confused, and I was almost out of it at this time.
Cirvanas has a dark face, and I can see her eyebrows fluttering from far away. I still have a little understanding of Cirvanas' character, and she has absolutely no clue about this kind of farce. Gurney’s enthusiasm as that old urchin, needless to say, was coerced and lured by Qian Qian to play the role, and now, the behavior of the old urchin Magni is obviously challenging the last limit of conscience of Sylvanas—seeing in the Empire For your sake, don't embarrass Azeroth!
"Shua!"
Cirvanas lifted his hand lightly, but no one could see what was going on, a weakened version of the shadow shot pierced the air, and after drawing a strange arc in midair, a feathered arrow trembled planted near Magni's chrysanthemum.
"Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! ”
"Shua Shua!"
"Big brother!"
"Third brother hold on!"
"Brother, run!"
"Yunchang! Protect the military division!"
"Hey! Cao thief dare!"
"Xiao Li Feidao, there are no mistakes!"
"Jianna! For the sake of the Dark Goddess! Help me throw these three dwarves down!"
"Your Highness, you can't... my gd!"
"Crack, creak, creak..."
The stage became more and more lively, but I had already heard a bad voice: It seems that the stage that has been strengthened countless times with arcane swayed just now
This bad conjecture was confirmed in the next second, and turned into a loud bang: "Boom!!"
Under the toss of a group of heroes, especially old urchins like Magni, the poor stage master couldn't hold it anymore. With a loud noise, the entire giant platform collapsed with overwhelming momentum, and the curtain brackets were in a mess. A few ethnic leaders who skipped work without integrity were all buried below.
Aegwynn, with a gray head on his head, stood expressionlessly on the ruins of the stage, holding a narration book in his hand: "In the end, the princess and queen lived a happy life without shame."
... Director, where is the prince
"Wow-"
Just when I was about to be overwhelmed by this stupid stage play, thunderous applause suddenly came from all directions.
The audience gathered here, as well as the guests who were attracted by various explosions in the middle, now burst into warm applause, and everyone's faces were wrinkled with joy.
"Well, at least it's a successful comedy." I tapped Qianqian's head lightly, still smiling.
I almost forgot, today is the carnival, everyone can put down the burden on their shoulders and have fun with the people, even Cirvanas has been dragged onto the stage, so why bother with the plot
More importantly, no matter how much you struggle, it will be of use...
But at this moment, a strange voice interrupted my applause with the crowd. Looking around, I found three men wearing top hats in the crowd. Unlike the joyful atmosphere of the people around them, these three A big man is crying with his head in his arms.
Judging from the energy reactions on them, these should be three heroic spirits, but they don't seem to belong to combat troops.
"Excuse me—what's the matter with you?"
I came to the side of the three crying men and asked inexplicably.
The first person raised his head and took off his hat to salute me: "Your Majesty, my name is Hans Christian Andersen." Then he pointed to the two similar-looking people next to him: "This is Jacob Green, this is William •Green…”
Shallow! Come and apologize! RO