Yun Jin went to the personnel department and went to Xu Zhiheng to go through the formalities. After the sick leave four years ago, she never took any public or annual leave, so Xu Zhiheng happily gave her fifteen days. Just before she left his office, he asked, "Yun Jin, are you okay, if you need any help, you can say."
Yun Jin held the door handle and forced a smile: "Thank you for the vacation you gave me."
It was night to fly back to the provincial capital of her hometown overnight. Yunjin immediately rushed to the provincial hospital after getting off the plane. In front of the ward, she saw her uncle who seemed to have aged overnight.
"Yunjin, you're back..." The man over fifty cried out.
"How's it going?" She could barely make out her voice.
"The doctor said that this recurrence, the cancer cells have spread to other organs, and chemotherapy has no meaning in the advanced stage."
In fact, she should have guessed it long ago. In the past few years, her mother's body has been volatile. Yunjin often persuades her to go to the hospital for re-examination, but her mother said that she did not dare to go to the hospital, for fear of not being overwhelmed by the disease but frightened by it. It is better to know nothing, to live one more day is happy. Perhaps, my mother already knew her condition in her heart.
Yun Jin pushed the door open, her hands were as cold as the metal doorknob.
Who can tell her that she actually went to the wrong ward. Who is this haggard woman with scattered gray hair in front of her, her once beautiful mother? Yun Jin sat on the edge of the bed, biting her trembling lips to stop herself from crying.
"Mom..." She couldn't help but call out softly, but she was afraid of waking up the sleeping person.
Mom opened her eyes very slowly and saw her, a light flashed in her cloudy eyes, and then it turned sad again.
"Yun Jin... You're here... Just in time, I dreamed of your father just now. He was blaming me. I promised him that he would only be by his side for the rest of his life. Yun Jin... He was blaming me... "
Yun Jin wanted to hold her mother's hand, but found a needle for infusion inserted on it. She trembled and said, "Dad won't blame you, no... Doctor, doctor..." Mother's face was contorted with pain, Yun Jin hurriedly said Shouting to the door, the uncle and the doctor rushed in together, and then the family members were locked out.
It shouldn't take long, but Yunjin and her uncle sat outside the door, waiting silently, like a century.
When the doctor came out, Yun Jin ran forward a few steps: "Doctor, how is my mother."
"The patient's condition is not optimistic. I suggest you to prepare yourself mentally."
"Save her. Please, no matter what method you use, save her." Yun Jin choked and begged.
"Don't worry, our hospital will do our best to save any patient." The doctor said a formulaic statement with a blank expression. Yun Jin watched the doctor walk away, and slumped into the chair. Yes, for the family members of each patient, the one on the hospital bed is their close relative and their beloved, but for the doctor, it is just a broken body that is not surprising.
"Uncle, go back and have a rest, I'm here." Yun Jin wiped her face with her hands and tried to calm down. Uncle has already cried to tears, she can't collapse, she must hold on, so that she can take care of her mother .
The next few days were a nightmare. My mother lived in a triple-room ward. The hospital beds were tight, and the three beds were full of people. The accompanying family members had to spend the night on the bench outside the ward. Later, Yunjin stuffed the doctor with a few red envelopes before letting the nurses stay there. A simple camp bed was set up beside my mother's bed, so that Lun Ye's uncle and Yun Jin had a place to live.
There are other patients living in the ward, and most of them are seriously ill. The patient in the next bed has advanced liver cancer. It hurts at night and moans all night. My mother's sleep has become extremely shallow, and it is easy to wake up with a little noise. She can't fall asleep at night, and people come and go during the day. Sleeping well has become a luxury, and her spirit is getting worse. This is not the worst. The patient by the window was dying, and finally died one night. When his mother was half asleep, she heard the shrill cries of the patient's family, and then watched helplessly. The corpse was carried out, her hands gripping Yunjin nervously, her knuckles turning white, her fingernails digging straight into Yunjin's flesh. The vacant bed was filled the next day with a new critically ill patient.
Yunjin then begged the doctor again, she was willing to pay a higher bed fee, just to let her mother live in a single-room ward, for this reason, I don’t know how many times the red envelopes were stuffed, and all I waited for was: There is no way. Seeing that my mother's body was collapsing day by day, she was more confused than when she was awake, she talked nonsense all day, vomited up what she ate, and even the nurse began to shake her head.
Yun Jin stayed in front of her mother's bed day and night. She hated herself for being useless. She was about to die. The chief doctor suddenly told her that a patient had just been discharged from the hospital, and a single ward was vacated, just for them. Yun Jin was ecstatic, and that day, she and her uncle, together with the nurse, moved her mother to the other side.
Although changing the ward did not improve my mother's condition, it was undeniable that at least it was much cleaner. On the ninth day after Yunjin came back, her mother was in the new ward, her spirits suddenly improved, her mind was very clear, she no longer shouted nonsense like the previous days, and her eyes were much clearer. She looked at her thin daughter with pity, and it was very difficult to say a few words: "Yun Jin, you are too stubborn..." Yun Jin's tears immediately came up, she tried her best to hold it back, and kept nodding her head. Mom closed her eyes and said in a low voice: "I think about it, everything is fine. I saw your father, he is coming to pick me up... Down below, your father is waiting for me, above, there is your uncle here Cry for me, what am I not satisfied with..."
That night, at five o'clock in the morning, my mother took her last breath on the hospital bed. Yunjin felt her mother's hand become cold, and then her uncle pulled her away from her mother. Standing on the hospital corridor, she watched the nurse push her mother, who was covered in white sheets, away, and tried to chase after her, but her feet were like lead. She leaned on the edge of the bench and slowly squatted down, listening to the sound of the wheels being pushed farther and farther, farther and farther, and finally no longer heard...
She didn't know how long she had been in this position. It was getting brighter, and someone came to talk to her, but she couldn't hear or remember what was said. She just wanted to curl up here alone and be like this all the time.
She didn't look back until there were hands on her shoulders, but the owner of those hands didn't wait for a while to leave like the others, but also squatted down and hugged her curled up in his arms. She remembered the embrace. She let the body behind her support her weight, and then heard him say, "Yun Jin, cry."
For four years, she has never cried. Even in the hospital, when the doctor told her that the child is gone, and there will be no more in the future, she did not cry either; day and night of taking care of her mother, no matter how difficult, She also held back her tears. Why should she be strong, why should she be independent, she only needs a shoulder to look forward to for her to cry.
She turned her head with difficulty, buried her face in his shoulders and neck, first sobbed silently, and then burst into tears: "I have no mother, no father, no children, nothing, this is how God treats me. punishment."