Suddenly, back to that snowy night. [This article is from ]
The cold air around her body was wave after wave, the wind roared, and the snowflakes as big as goose feathers were extremely cold, but her body would heat up. She squeezed into the pyre and refused to come out. "Why me? Why not my sister? Why me?"
She was five years old that year, but that question was indeed something she should have asked.
She grew up in a small fishing village in the south of the Yangtze River, but she did not make a living by fishing. She had an elder sister and a younger brother at home. She was the elder sister's younger sister and the younger brother's elder sister, ranking second. But I don't know why, the harvest of the land was good, and my father was still helping in the rich man's workshop, but the family was getting poorer and poorer. She was only five years old and didn't understand this at the time. It's just that the second time that person Yazi came to the house, it was that snowy night. She ran out and hid in the wood stack outside the house and didn't dare to go home until the empress came to find her.
"Why me?"
She cried and asked, the family didn't say anything, but she just knew something. I don't know what the future holds, but I'm... going to be sent out. Although there are many things at home and it is very poor, she still knows that only staying at home is the best, better than outside.
She knew it wouldn't be her brother, but she didn't understand why it wasn't her sister, even though she didn't want her to leave... Empress hugged her and cried and said, "Because you are smart, you are smarter than your sister, you are smart, go out, and you are better than your sister. Sister has a way to survive. Don't blame your father, you blame your mother... "
She always remembered her mother crying that she was smarter. She was sold, changed hands several times, sold to brothels, trained, beaten and scolded, and was full and hungry. After a few years, she grew taller and looked more beautiful, and because of her intelligence, she was raised with delicious food and drink, and teachers came to teach them manners and education, teaching them to study, chess, calligraphy and painting.
She always remembered her father and mother, and that night when it snowed heavily. You are smarter and have a better way to survive than your sister. When she really understood this, she wondered if she wanted to hate her father and mother. When she was about thirteen years old, she made her first appearance in the brothel as a court lady to entertain guests. Almost fifteen years old. The copper coins and pieces of silver she had saved by her side were finally exchanged for a big silver ingot, and she was finally able to get the eyes of the brothel mother, giving her a chance to go back to save her relatives.
She remembered that when Yang's mother told her about this, her face was full of contempt and sarcasm. For worthless women, Yang's mother had always been indifferent, and she only had fear in her heart. Can't understand the meaning of the other person's glance. She held and held the ingot in both hands, and even asked Uncle Guinu of Jinfenglou to rent a pony carriage for her and went all the way back. At that time, she didn't think about how to face her father and mother. Whether to hate them or forgive them, she thought that she would be able to figure it out when she got there. She could, with her mood at that time, turn around and leave after scolding them and ignore them for the rest of her life. Or leave Yuan Baoer and turn around and leave. I will ignore them for the rest of my life. One ingot, fifty taels of silver, is enough for a family for a long time.
But she didn't get the chance to hate or forgive.
Dad went to the mountain to chop wood and fell to his death. The younger brother fell ill and borrowed money from the rich man's house, but the disease was still not cured. After the younger brother died, the mother died too. She remembered what the mother said, you are smart, maybe there is a way to survive.
However, my sister married the son of the rich man's grandfather's family as a concubine, and she is still alive today.
So she changed into a villager's clothes and went to find her sister. She didn't tell her that she was a prostitute. In the backyard of the rich man's house, her sister didn't ask her about her experience over the years. How do the other concubines compete for favor, the things that don't look good to the other, the bullying she receives, the husband who reads some books and spends money in the kiln in the town all day long, these kinds of things. She didn't stay until noon and left, because the rich man's son came back and saw her, and then her eyes changed a little. After that, the way her sister looked at her also changed, and she began to hesitate and be wary.
She was able to become an oiran in the Golden Wind Tower later, and her sister's appearance was not bad, but the education in the past ten years has made a difference. Although she wears patched clothes, she is too eye-catching compared to her sister, sister... He was even a little afraid that he would stay and compete with her for favor. Holding the Yuanbaoer, she followed the traveling uncle Guinu back to Jinfenglou, a small fishing village that she has never been to since then.
She is wise and has a way to live. From then on, she knew what she wanted. She wanted to walk happily along this life path. Maybe in the future, there will be a very powerful and powerful genius with a good family background who will marry him back home, be a concubine, and live happily ever after.
Of course, there are also some things that she has always longed for.
That young lady named Yunzhu, I met her when she was studying with her teacher. She has a good temper and is willing to help others. I heard that she used to be a miss of the official family. Maybe she has the temperament of a miss of the official family. , she doesn't have that kind of temperament, she just feels... a little envious.
Of course, they didn't have much interaction with each other. Later, they both became clerks in the Golden Wind Tower, and they were just nodding acquaintances. Jin'er felt that she had some kind of longing for her, and that kind of longing was difficult to explain clearly. Of course, not everyone in the Golden Wind Tower is accustomed to Nie Yunzhu's style. Some girls are very hostile to her. She looked like she couldn't get used to her being so unhappy that she could be famous as the most famous courtesan. Even her mother, Yang Xiuhong, seemed dissatisfied with Nie Yunzhu, and scolded her occasionally.
Yuan Jin'er, who untied the knot and saw the road ahead, was very happy, and soon there were more and more Yuan Baoer around her. She just watched all this and released a little corner of her heart to look forward to the one named Nie Yunzhu. woman, and then kept her acquaintance with a nonchalant nod. Later, Nie Yunzhu really left the Jinfeng Building. Mother Yang was a cold-hearted person. Of course, her kindness wouldn't be random, but she cared about these capable women in the building. She once said that in such an environment, if she is not good enough, she is not worthy of living, and if she is really not beautiful, then God will not give you food. In this world, there is nothing to complain about.
She scolded and scolded like that to make Sister Yunzhu recognize the reality and choose the easy way, but in the end it was unsuccessful. Even so, she still gave Yunzhu the opportunity to teach the piano in the building.
However, he will not take that road, although he has grown up. Being able to recognize exactly what it is that you are looking forward to, but it is all unnecessary and unreasonable thinking. I am very smart, and I will keep walking down this road of living, or I can say that I am a utilitarian person. Sometimes I feel that when my father and mother sent me out, they just wanted me to live, just to live... But when I saw that Nie Yunzhu was in an embarrassment, I couldn't help but want to send some money...
She is a utilitarian person, she persuades herself like this, but she can get to the end. Smart people can't help but think too much. Coming out of the Golden Wind Tower, is Mama Yang's knife mouth happy or disappointed? Maybe both. What do fathers and mothers in heaven think? Do you feel like you're doing it right, or do you feel like you've given up on your life? she does not know.
But she was having a good time. People who can come out of that environment together can easily become close sisters. Since then, she has regarded Sister Yunzhu as the closest person to each other. After that, there was that eccentric man who would suddenly appear or disappear, which became the barrier between her and Sister Yunzhu. But it also brought her to see the scenery that she had never imagined before.
Gradually…
Likes to argue with him. Look at the way he jokes. There is no formal appearance. I like to see his helpless expression because he occupies Sister Yunzhu. I like to see him proud after taking advantage of Sister Yunzhu because of his carelessness. Did he know that it was intentional
I like to see him calmly in front of me and Sister Yunzhu. A calm demeanor in front of others. I like to hear people talk about his news and people compliment him. I like how he looks serious. I like how he protects himself and Sister Yunzhu in front of the Su family. Like and dislike the way he looks when he's stained with blood. Will he know that he likes him so much...
It was also because of him and Sister Yunzhu. She gradually saw that in her heart, the little girl who was standing in the snow, holding her Yuanbaoer, was crying all the time. In her heart, she might be in pain. It's a pity that this little girl can't see it herself, and she can't feel the pain. It was only now that she was able to see her gradually, and it was because she saw her that she felt that the pain was no longer there.
****************
"...No problem, it's not a disease. I'm depressed, qi and blood are a little disordered, I have something on my mind, and I can't get out of it. Sleep and diet have probably been affected these days, but it depends on the physical condition. It didn't take long. Just prescribe some medicine, and if you drink it, it's just a trick to deceive her... You should have been more lively before, right?"
Under the eaves, golden light shone down, and the middle-aged doctor with the medicine box on his back said so. After Ning Yi heard it, he looked back at the room, and then nodded: "Well, it's more lively... Is it really okay?"
"Such a heart disease is not a big deal, but if it is small, some are not small. Some women live in a deep house compound. Doctor Nian wentssips for a while, then shook his head with a smile, "But I see this girl, there shouldn't be such a thing, you find the crux, enlighten me, eat well, sleep well, it will be good... I'll wait for the prescription. Let someone send it, and say goodbye first."
"This is the consultation fee... Thank you. Go slowly." Ning Yi took out the money from his sleeve, then handed over and watched the doctor go away. He stood under the eaves and looked at the woman in the room who was still asleep on the bed. For a moment, He raised his head, took a breath, and then let out a long breath, and walked towards it.
"Really..."
****************
When I woke up, I realized that I had that long dream. Open your eyes, the bright sunlight shines on the door, the powder of light swirls in the air, the window on the other side is also opened, the wind blows in, the feeling of cool and bright, brushing books and papers, clattering lightly. ring.
Then she realized that she was sleeping on the bed in Ning Yi's room. There seemed to be a wet towel covering her forehead. It felt slightly cool and comfortable, but there was still some pain in the place she hit before, I'm afraid Got a package.
Turning his head, Ning Yi was sitting at the table sorting out his manuscript. Jin'er recalled that she messed up the other party's manuscript, and felt a little guilty, so she didn't dare to move around, quietly closed her eyes, and pretended that she hadn't woken up.
It's not just because of the manuscript that I feel that I can't face him. If that's the case, I'll just stick my head in the ground and pretend the world is peaceful...
she thought.
************
The new title is more appropriate, the previous title with one word of love is considered to be the end of the top and bottom...