On the way to the next village, I thought Ling Ruxue would say something to me, at least the answer she knew, but she said nothing. She told me: "You just put yourself in the village anyway." What do you do when you know so much about being a hostage?"
"Why can't I know? At least if I know something, I will feel more at ease." The weirdness in the village gave me an urge to know the answer. Especially since Ling Ruxue said that these villagers were pitiful, I wanted to know why.
I asked myself that I am not the kind of very chivalrous person who has to save the world as his own duty. What I care most about is the people around me. However, people always have to have a bottom line of conscience. This bottom line of conscience can at least touch you and make you do something.
Otherwise, you will live in this world indifferently, and you will have money, power, and unlimited glory. It's essentially the same as the walking dead, and it doesn't make any sense.
This is what Master said is the great righteousness. Only by sacrificing one's life and becoming benevolent can one's life shine with brilliance.
Just like before the national crisis, there were so many soldiers who were willing to defend the country with their own flesh and blood, and fought one after another. This is the bottom line of conscience. Yes, maybe before the bottom line of conscience breaks out, they may be just ordinary people with a little selfishness.
I didn't really ask Ling Ruxue this for reassurance, but based on the clues I knew, the answer I guessed had touched the bottom line of my conscience, and I wanted to confirm it.
But Ling Ruxue seemed to have guessed me. She said: "Chen Chengyi, I can't tell you. Sometimes you know the truth and then feel helpless. It's particularly painful. Instead of thinking about things that you can't solve at all, you can It’s better to think about how to solve the dilemma of being a hostage.”
I sighed. I have experienced enough of this feeling of being helpless yet full of passion, and I have learned enough lessons! I don't know if Ling Ruxue cares about me, because she is afraid that I will impulsively put myself into a more dangerous situation.
Or maybe she thinks I'm unreliable, too impulsive and lacking enough ability.
I couldn't guess this woman, but the feeling of being guessed by her made me uncomfortable. However, I felt that she might have guessed me only three years ago, not who I am now. I said, "You seem to understand me very well." That feeling of pain and powerlessness?”
"I've always known each other very well. I've known each other since I was born. It's not just me, all the generations in the village have known each other since a certain year." When Ling Ruxue said this, she didn't look at me, her eyes just looked ahead. But the emotion contained in the tone cannot be described in a thousand words. I can feel it and follow it with sadness.
There was no conversation all the way. Only Hui Gen'er looked at this and that lively. When he was tired, he rested on my back. I was very touched by that dependence and trust.
As I said at the beginning, I don't understand why Hui Gen'er is so dependent on me, but I can't bear this dependence. Some feelings are already very heavy when you don't know it.
I once held these heavy feelings in my hands and was afraid of losing them. Once they touched me, I would go crazy. I can vaguely remember the words I yelled to Master: "I won't let go."
Now, it's the same. I'm afraid of losing, but I also understand a truth. Being crazy and willful can't stop the feelings you value. The people you value will not be hurt. Maybe things can only get worse. Don't you do bad things with good intentions? Son? Just like the hard slap Brother Sheng gave me!
In fact, I have learned a lot. For example, if you really value them and really care about them, then try your best to protect them, but there are many ways to protect them.
Master, I don’t know this either. I have matured a bit. Faced with my childishness, you have always been the most indulgent. You often say that a man cannot be said to be mature before he is 30 years old. If he is mature before 30 years old, Men should be the result of being overthrown. It means that I have experienced too much pain and had to mature, but I must have left a lot of psychological distortions. This process is a pity.
But you are hoping that I will mature earlier, right? I can feel your pressure not to leave me, and I bear the pain of my helplessness in trying to push things away. Maybe there is something you can't help but do
While walking in silence, I thought too much, and finally my eyes stopped on Hui Gen'er's little face resting on my shoulder. I will protect Hui Gen'er. Under certain circumstances, Hui Gen'er followed me on this trip. It's the safest.
As if she had a tacit understanding, Ling Ruxue suddenly said to me: "Chen Chengyi, your impulse to bring Hui Gen'er this time was a failure. I almost misjudged you."
I smiled and said: "Really? Because I brought Hui Gen'er with me this time, do you think that I am going to cause trouble in the Black Rock Miao Village and rescue the hostages? If I were Rambo, I would I might consider doing that.”
"Who is Rambo?" Ling Ruxue looked at me in confusion.
I suddenly felt very happy. It turned out that Ling Ruxue was as 'erudite' as she was, but she didn't know Rambo? Hasn't she seen the movie? I said: "Have you never seen the movie? Don't you know Rambo in First Blood? He is a very powerful man."
Ling Ruxue said calmly: "I haven't watched the movie. I haven't had enough time to study while I'm outside."
I suddenly asked impulsively: "Do you want to watch a movie?"
"I don't know, is the movie good?" It's rare for Ling Ruxue to be curious about something.
But Ling Ruxue like this made me particularly tempted. I couldn't help but say: "From now on, how about I take you to a movie? I'll also treat you to a Coke. I'm treating you without any money."
"Ah?" Ling Ruxue seemed a little surprised, but she didn't give me any answer, turned around and walked forward.
I carried Hui Gen'er on my back and shouted to Ling Ruxue's back: "Ling Ruxue, I brought Hui Gen'er not impulsively, but for a real reason. You believe me."
"You don't need to explain anything to me. Your master often told my aunt that Taoists act as they please. They don't need to explain anything to others, and they don't need others to understand anything, as long as they can live up to the conscience of heaven and earth. You Taoists are all He is free and casual and has no sense of responsibility. So, you don't need to explain at all." This was the longest time Ling Ruxue spoke to me, but she was speaking ill of my master and our Taoist family.
But I couldn't argue with it, because my master is such a person.
I was carrying Hui Gen'er on my back and stood dazedly on the path in the mountain forest. I suddenly thought of Ru Yue. I'm sorry, Ru Yue, I also lied to you, but there are some things that I can't say to Su Rou and Qin Huai. Say to you.
Although, I know you are kind to me and willing to risk your life with me.
However, this time, whether it is you or your sister, I have no intention of letting you get involved. All I want is that you bring me here.
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This time, we walked through the mountains and forests for nearly 10 hours before arriving at the last village. When we got here, I had the illusion that this village was the most remote village in China.
Because to get to the nearest town from here, you have to walk for at least a whole day, and then you have to ride a horse or a car. Thinking about it, it feels scary to be closed.
However, when I think about it, there are so many uninhabited areas in our country, and this village is not the most remote. At least it is only the original ecology, and the roads are still difficult to navigate. If the country is determined to build roads, this place will slowly be infected. traces of modernity.
After all, the natural resources here are not bad. Could it be that the country deliberately 'forgot' this place
The situation in this village is similar to that of the last village we passed. It is just as poor, maybe a little poorer, because in this village, thatched houses are rare, and most are bark houses.
Compared to the previous village, the people in this village are more lazy and indifferent to everything! Ling Ruxue and I were walking in this village and found that almost everyone in the village had nothing to do. They just gathered together to play cards and be in a daze.
In the previous village, we could at least see neglected land. In this village, we didn’t even see neglected land.
After my careful observation, I found that the whole village was very strange. There was a polarization in age. In addition to a large number of 'old people', there were also a large number of children in the village. These children were probably also affected by the attitudes of the adults. They all lacked children. We should have the energy and energy, and even less madness.
There are even children sleeping on the dirt road in the village, and no one takes care of them.
If this were modern times, I might think this was a 'left-behind village' because young people had gone out to work. But that was in the 1990s, and there was no such concept at all. I knew very well that these so-called old people might be young. 'scary'!