Zhou Shaojin didn't know how long she had been standing in the official room until a gust of wind blew over, making her body cold. She came to her senses and slowly squatted beside the door of the official room, hugging herself tightly with her hands.
But even so, she still felt cold.
Tears slowly fell down, dripping onto the blue stone bricks, forming a small pool of water.
She wants to go home.
Leave all this behind and go home.
But where is her home
Yuqian Hutong was given to her by Uncle Chi. Although her father in Baoding Prefecture treats her well, he probably won't let her off easily when he knows that she has fallen in love with Uncle Chi, right
Go find your sister
She thought of the way Zhou Chujin hugged Guan Ge.
no!
She couldn't disturb her sister anymore. Her sister finally lived a peaceful and comfortable life.
Zhou Shaojin stared stupidly at the water stains on the bluestone bricks.
The voice of the little maid came from outside: "Hasn't the second cousin been found yet?"
The maids at home would call her "Second Miss", and only the maids in the Cheng mansion would call her "Second Cousin Miss".
Zhou Shaojin subconsciously hid in the cubicle where the toilet was.
The lily-scented incense burner gave her a headache.
From outside came the cautious voice of a little maid: "Second cousin! Second cousin!"
"I'm fine!" Zhou Shaojin replied, his voice a little hoarse, "My stomach hurts a little! I'll be back soon."
The little maid smiled and replied "yes", then retreated.
Silence returned outside.
Only then did Zhou Shaojin realize that his face was covered with tears.
If she walks out like this, everyone will definitely know that she has cried, right
She took out a handkerchief and wiped her face.
Thinking of what Mrs. Guo said, I felt angry.
In her previous life, Mrs. Guo also looked down on her like this, as if she was a useless person.
And as for Yuan, she always felt that she had brought shame to Yuan.
In the final analysis, it just means that he thinks she is weak and can be bullied.
Why should she let them flatten and round her
Zhou Shaojin was not convinced.
She did wrong in her previous life, so is she going to continue making the same mistakes in this life
The Bodhisattva gave her a chance to be reborn, but could he just let her continue on the same old path as in her previous life
Even if you want to cry, don't cry at this time!
Even if it's embarrassing, I can't lose face in this kind of situation!
Zhou Shaojin raised his voice slightly and asked, "Is there anyone else outside?"
The maid who had just agreed replied, "I, the servant Zhuyu, will be guarding outside the door!"
Zhou Shaojin said, "Please go quietly call Nanny Shang who came with me into the mansion. I have something urgent to discuss with her."
When a girl is a guest at someone else's house, there's no guarantee that something unexpected might happen, such as her period coming suddenly and staining her clothes... The maid didn't suspect anything and hurried to call Nanny Shang over.
Nanny Shang was a shrewd person. She stuffed a few copper coins into the servant girl's pocket at the door and sent her away. Then she called out "Second Miss" in a low voice, "There's no one outside!"
Only then did Zhou Shaojin walk out from the room.
Nanny Shang was shocked when she saw her slightly red and swollen eyes.
Zhou Shaojin was no longer polite to her and said, "You better think of a solution quickly. Others won't be able to see that I cried."
Nanny Shang agreed repeatedly. Thinking that this was a government room with cool water, she soaked a handkerchief and let her apply it to her eyes. She then went to call Chunwan over. The two of them quietly helped her wash her face, comb her hair, and put on light makeup. Except for her eyes being a little red, it didn't look like she had been crying.
Zhou Shaojin's mind was blank, and she let them paint her face all the time until Nanny Shang reminded her in a low voice. Then she took a deep breath, sat down on the beauty's backrest on the corridor outside the official residence, looked at the lush boxwood trees, and carefully thought about what Mrs. Guo said.
What the old lady said actually makes a lot of sense.
It's not groundless, nor is it meant to disrespect or attack her.
If she really married into the Cheng family, how to face Cheng Jiashan would be a difficult problem. If she was not careful, Cheng Jiashan might think that Uncle Chi had snatched her away... After all, Uncle Chi had been very good to her before, and if there was nothing between her and Uncle Chi, no one would think about it. But once she married Uncle Chi, even things that didn't happen could be made up, let alone things that really happened!
Zhou Shaojin twisted the handkerchief in his hand.
But what if she just listened to Madam Guo and gave up
She thought of Cheng Chi’s gentle smile, warm embrace, and the tenderness on his face when he whispered to coax her... Her heart ached so much that she stood up suddenly.
No, no, no!
She couldn't give up Uncle Chi.
In this world, no one can compare to Uncle Chi in her heart.
She wanted to be with him.
Even if she would be blamed, embarrassed, and insulted in the future, she wanted to be with Uncle Chi.
Zhou Shaojin took a few steps forward anxiously, then stopped.
But what if... Uncle Chi regrets it
Sometimes imagining it is one thing, but actually facing it is another.
She is good for nothing. She can neither help Uncle Chi achieve anything nor help him entertain relatives. What if Uncle Chi regrets it after a long time
Zhou Shaojin vaguely felt that he might not survive!
It wasn't because Uncle Chi had changed his mind, but because she herself had lost all desire to live.
She thought of the long, lonely and numb days she had spent at the farm in Daxing in her previous life.
She could hold on to those days, and with the good memories of Uncle Chi, why couldn't she hold on to them
As the thought flashed through her mind, there was a "boom" in her mind, like thunder.
A long time ago, when she wanted something but couldn't get it, she had thought so.
All I need is a bit of his tenderness, all I need is a moment of his looking back... How come after getting it, I forget what I originally insisted on
It’s true that human desires are insatiable!
Zhou Shaojin slowly sat on the beauty's seat again.
The mind gradually becomes clear.
Just as Mrs. Guo said, Uncle Chi even encouraged the Yuan family to split up for her sake.
There is no wall that is completely airtight.
If Yuan knew about this, how would Uncle Chi be able to hold his head up high in the future!
But if Uncle Chi was cursed and blamed by everyone, but she cowardly gave up, leaving him alone to face the world's blame... like betrayal... This would probably make Uncle Chi more sad than the world's curses and accusations, right
Didn’t she experience something like this in her previous life
When Yuan scolded her, when the maids in Jiuru Lane pointed fingers at her... She hated Cheng Xu... At that time, she only had overwhelming hatred... Now thinking about it, she was probably more resentful of him for leaving her alone to endure it...
Uncle Chi treated her so well, he was the one she held in her heart, and she still felt it was not enough. How could she hurt him just because she was afraid? And how could she watch him being blamed just because she would be despised by the world
Zhou Shaojin smoothed the handkerchief in her hand, adjusted her temples, then stood up and said with a smile to Shang Ma and Chun Wan who were standing not far away and looking at her worriedly, "Let's go, let's go to the flower hall, don't let them wait for me!"
The two exchanged a quick look.
How come the second young lady, who just now looked as withered as a dying flower, suddenly became radiant, proud and reserved like a general who had won a battle
They were very puzzled.
However, Zhou Shaojin no longer cared about all that.
She walked quickly into the flower hall.
The church service was at a crucial point.
But her arrival still attracted everyone's attention.
Zhou Chujin smiled and motioned for her sister to sit next to her.
Mrs. Guo was slightly stunned.
Zhou Shaojin's eyes were still a little red, and if you paid attention, you could easily tell that she had cried. But her demeanor was calm and composed, with a calmness and courage that seemed to be well-prepared, and even more resolute than before.
It's like a beautiful but mediocre painting of a lady, which suddenly has a soul after being painted with highlights by a skilled painter.
Mrs. Guo felt awe-inspiring.
Fang Xuan frowned unhappily.
Zhou Shaojin took it calmly, walked to Zhou Chujin with a smile, spoke a few words to her in a low voice, then stood up and walked towards Mrs. Guo.
Mrs. Guo smiled slightly, but her eyes were particularly sharp.
Zhou Shaojin's heart was pounding and his hands and feet felt weak.
But she knew that if she really married Cheng Chi, no, if her feelings for Cheng Chi were known to others, she would be looked at ten, a hundred, or even a thousand times more sharply than Mrs. Guo... She couldn't back down.
And never back down.
If she backed down, it would be the end of her and Uncle Chi!
Zhou Shaojin's hands hidden in her sleeves were clenched into fists, but her smile was still peaceful and gentle.
"Madam," she stopped in front of Luohan's bed, letting Fang Xuan look at her in confusion, "I have something I want to talk to you alone..."
Have you made the decision so quickly
Mrs. Guo was secretly surprised.
Should I choose to leave Silang or continue to follow Silang
Mrs. Guo didn't realize that her breathing had become heavy.
She smiled and stood up with the help of Fang Xuan.
Everyone looked over.
The two actors who were singing in the hall didn't know what was happening and stopped in confusion.
Madam Guo smiled and said, "It's okay, it's okay, you guys continue singing. Shaojin has something to tell me."
Under the watchful eyes of everyone, Zhou Shaojin became the focus of everyone.
This made her very uncomfortable.
But she still kept her smile.
Old Madam Guo stared at her deeply for a few breaths, then turned and left the flower hall.
Fang Xuan hurriedly followed.
Mrs. Guo smiled and said, "Go listen to the opera! I'll call the maid if there's anything."
Fang Xuan said "Oh" and couldn't help but look at Zhou Shaojin before leaving.
Zhou Shaojin supported Mrs. Guo as he did in the past, and as if nothing had happened, the two of them walked slowly towards the big locust tree in the yard.
Mrs. Guo said nothing.
Zhou Shaojin chose to speak first.
She said, "Madam, I have thought carefully about what you just said, and you are right..." She is in love with Uncle Chi! Zhou Shaojin blushed slightly. She didn't have the face to say such words in front of Madam Guo. "But I still want to try!"
"Try it!" Madam Guo stopped and looked at her more sharply, "What a child's talk! Can a person who has been killed come back to life? Can a person who is despised by the world still live a dignified life? Try it! Do you know what the consequences of trying it will be..."
"I know!" Zhou Shaojin said softly, "But I still want to try - this matter is not Uncle Chi's fault alone." She lowered her eyelids, "If I rejected Uncle Chi, how could Uncle Chi go to this point. Since I am also wrong, I should be with Uncle Chi... No matter what difficulties I encounter in the future, I want to be with Uncle Chi..."
As she spoke, she knelt in front of Mr. Guo and said seriously, "Madam, please help me!"
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Dear, an extra chapter for Xiao Xixi!
PS: I have to go on a business trip today, but I will be back in the evening. I am not satisfied with the quantity or quality of the updates during this period, let alone everyone else. I thought about it carefully and decided to update twice a day today. However, today's update may be very late, and it will also be very late to correct typos and so on. Everyone, please get up tomorrow morning and read it!
O(∩_∩)O~
※(To be continued)