Zi'an looked at her in surprise. Her eyes were full of emotion and her face was soft and hazy. She no longer had the coldness and indifference she had before. She looked like a woman in love.
"But didn't you tell me before that you had no such intention towards Emperor Kangping? You also said that you didn't want to get married." Zi'an sorted out her thoughts. She even suspected that Qin Zhou saw through her intentions and said this on purpose. However, the expression on her face was unprecedented. She had never thought that Qin Zhou could have such an expression before, so she was stunned for a moment.
If she was pretending, it was too convincing.
"A lot of things happened between us after you returned to the country. During the days when I was imprisoned, the emperor always found ways to send me this and that. How could a woman not be moved?" Qin Zhou sighed, his eyes seeming to contain some sadness, but also some joy.
Zi'an really couldn't figure out whether she was real or fake at this moment.
"What do you think, Your Majesty? Is it okay for me to marry her?" Qin Zhou asked Zi'an.
Zi'an thought about it. Lao Qi and others also praised Emperor Kangping highly, which showed that he was a man of both virtue and morality. However, he had too few connections and his foundation was too shallow. Without Qin Zhou, he would not be able to sit firmly on the throne. If Qin Zhou could marry him, perhaps the Northern Desert could really be pacified.
But, does Qin Zhou really like him? If she sacrifices her lifelong happiness just to support Emperor Kang Ping, she will not be happy to see it.
So, Zi'an said seriously: "Qin Zhou, you lied to me, you don't like Emperor Kangping, right?"
"Maybe I didn't think I liked him before, but tonight, after listening to what the old prince and Xiao Xiao said, I thought about it myself and confirmed that I have feelings for him. Besides, isn't it the best solution for me to marry him? I don't have to be a traitor, and I can support him in pacifying the Northern Desert and killing Chu Jing."
As she spoke, she gave a bitter smile, "Actually, I know you all expect me to do something. I understand your thoughts, but if you really want me to be an empress, I don't want to. It's not that I don't have this ambition. I have fought on the battlefield for many years and killed countless people. I have this ruthlessness and this ambition, but I also know that I can't be a good emperor. A general who only knows how to fight can't be an emperor. The emperor carries the people of the whole country on his shoulders. I don't have the confidence to feed them and keep them warm."
"You are carrying too much now, Qin Zhou, you should find a way to make yourself happy." Zi'an sighed. Although she knew it was irrational to say this and it did not conform to the current reality of Beimo, she really hoped that Qin Zhou could be happy instead of giving blindly and finally having to sacrifice her whole life for the stability of Beimo.
"Happy, Zi'an, I'm not lying to you. I never thought of taking this path before, but after thinking about it just now, I feel very happy. I didn't want to get married before because I was self-righteous and felt that no man in the world was worthy of me. Maybe it was because I had always had this idea and never thought that I would have this choice in my life. Just now, the old prince reminded me, and I suddenly realized it. Now I really want to go back to Beimo as soon as possible to facilitate this marriage."
Qin Zhou spoke happily and enthusiastically, as if she really wanted to fly back to Beimo immediately to marry Emperor Kangping.
Seeing her like this, Zi'an didn't know what to say. After a long while, she said, "If you feel happy, just do it."
"Okay." Qin Zhou looked at her and asked as if he suddenly remembered something: "By the way, what did you come to me for?"
Zi'an was slightly stunned. Since you said so, what else can I say
He just smiled awkwardly and said, "It's okay, I just couldn't sleep, so I wanted to come over and chat with you."
Qin Zhou said: "Okay, what do you want to talk about?"
"It's nothing. Go take a shower early. Look at you, you reek of alcohol. How do you look like a bride?" Zi'an said with a smile.
Qin Zhou also smiled, "If he likes me, he will think I am pretty even if I get drunk every day."
"Yes, that's right." Zi'an took a deep breath and stared at her. "Qin Zhou, I don't know whether what you said is true or false. You are used to hiding your thoughts very deeply, and I can't see through them. Therefore, I can only wish you a happy and joyful life."
Qin Zhou's eyebrows were painted with soft light, "I will, and you too, be happy and cheerful."
Zian stood up and said, "Okay, I'm going back."
Qin Zhou also stood up and said, "I'll take you there."
Zi'an had already turned her head, but turned back again. Qin Zhou was very enthusiastic tonight, which made Zi'an feel that he was nothing like the Qin Zhou she knew.
Just by turning around, she looked into Qin Zhou's unprepared eyes. Qin Zhou's stiff smile was tinged with unconcealable sadness.
"you… "
Qin Zhou hugged her and said quickly: "Don't ask, don't tell, everything is fine."
Her slightly trembling voice was right beside Zi'an's ears, and the tipsy feeling of alcohol spread. Zi'an was a little dazed, and only felt Qin Zhou's heartbeat very fast. Even when holding her like this, he couldn't see her face, but he seemed to see the sadness in her eyes.
Zi'an's heart sank. It was just as she thought.
However, her acting was good at the beginning, but she couldn’t hold up well later on.
After hugging her for just a moment, Qin Zhou immediately let her go. His face had returned to normal, even more cold and distant than before. "Zi'an, don't worry about me. There is nothing I can't bear."
"I'm fine." Zi'an felt his chest was filled with an inexplicable sadness. He opened his mouth to say something, but he didn't know what to say.
"Go back!" Qin Zhou turned around, leaving her with a stern back.
Zi'an slowly turned around and walked out, closing the door for her.
She walked back to the room with heavy steps. When she touched her face, she found it was covered with traces of tears.
"Why are you crying?" Seeing this, Murong Jie, who was lying down, immediately stood up and walked over.
Zi'an hugged him suddenly and cried silently. Murong Jie just hugged her without saying anything, letting her cry quietly.
After a long while, she raised her head, her eyes were very red and swollen, "Qin Zhou said that she wants to marry Emperor Kang Ping."
Murong Jie was not surprised at all. "This is the best thing for Beimo."
Zi'an wanted to refute, but he had no way to refute, because this was the best way out for Beimo and Emperor Kangping.
But what about Qin Zhou
Do the people of Beimo care about what Qin Zhou has paid
And Emperor Kangping, is he using Qin Zhou or does he have some real feelings for him
Zi'an found it hard to accept that a loveless political marriage would happen to Qin Zhou.
"You care about her, so you feel sad for her. If you stay out of it, you will know that this is the best solution. Qin Zhou can return home, and Beimo will no longer have to be controlled by Chu Jing, the warlike emperor."
Zi'an didn't know that this short journey back to Beijing and these few short words would change Qin Zhou's life.
Nothing was deliberate, everything just happened naturally, as if it had been predestined.
Qin Zhou thought of thousands of ways to return to Beimo, but she had never thought of marrying Emperor Kangping directly. Even when the old prince said this, she was still thinking about waiting for an opportunity to fight her way back. But with Zi'an's arrival, she peeped into what he was thinking, and this idea came to her mind in an instant.
(End of this chapter)