"I don't know if it's Xiaobai's psychological shadow or vampire instinct. I feel like I can't get up after falling asleep."
These words made Zach, who was about to go back to his room to sleep, stand still.
Turning around and looking at Winston sitting against the wall, Zach... sighed.
Ning Zac, who had just meditated, realized that he had returned to a life of working for a certain interest group. Maybe this is Toledo's fate.
But at this moment, Zach was pulled back to himself.
Zach sat down next to Winston, "I've been like this for a while too." He smiled at Winston and said, "No, it's two paragraphs."
Winston had no intention of doing anything anyway, and looked at Zach with an expression that he was willing to hear the details.
"The first paragraph should be the time when I first became a vampire." Zach said with a smile on his face, "You know that vampires in the past, especially those with status in the clan, were forced to sleep. Time."
Winston blinked and thought for a while, "Are you saying that the Thirteen Clans have not yet obtained the ability to travel by day?"
"Yes~" Zach nodded, "Vampires during the day, at least us Toledo, people without jobs, are forced to sleep at the request of their father. Because for vampires whose desires are amplified When you are awake, you will be bored, bored, haha, in that era, when all desires are not as easy to satisfy as they are now, this is a very bad state."
Winston curled his lips, "Hank said that your job was to help the noble vampires clear out the vampires who had ruined the reputation of the vampire race."
Guess how many incidents that tarnished the reputation of the vampire race happened because of boredom? a lot of.
Zach smiled, "Not only that, for vampires at that time, especially for vampires with aristocratic status, sleep was not only a waste of boring time, but also a status symbol." Zach raised his eyebrows, "You can imagine Those idle wealthy children have nothing else to do except sleep and eat." Zach's mouth curved, "Because nobles don't need to do anything~"
Winston thought for a while and understood, "Nobles have status and power, and they don't have to worry about their own survival like those guys who ruin the reputation of vampires."
Zach nodded, "So sleep. For vampires, sleeping is a very..." Zach thought about the wording, "A proud activity."
Winston lowered his head and said nothing.
Zach didn't mean to mock Winston, and continued, "But no matter how much my father taught me to embrace my proud aristocracy, I just couldn't sleep."
Winston looked up again, "Why?"
"I feel like I can't get up after falling asleep~" Zach looked at Winston with a smile. This was probably not a joke, "This is the instinct of a vampire."
Zach began to explain the reason for sighing just now, "Toledo is a noble, a noble with guaranteed living space and safety, so as soon as I become a Toledo, I can enjoy sleep. But my instinct tells me that as a new student Vampire, I can't expose myself in my most vulnerable state so casually."
Winston looked in agreement, "That's it. I know Hank has emphasized to me many times that there is no safer place than Grande, but I just, uh, just..."
"I don't believe it~" Zach helped Winston pick up, "I was once a human being who was nothing, and suddenly entered the Toledo clan. I don't believe that everything I saw in front of me was real. So no matter what my father told me My Toledo clan is a noble and safe, I can’t believe it.”
Winston was stunned for a moment, eager to explain, "It's not that I don't believe in Hank, I don't believe in you, I don't believe that Grande is safe, I just..."
It was Zach who helped Winston fill in, "Suddenly entering the Grande." Zach smiled, "The point is not 'believe', but the sudden change in life, the change in the environment, the change in which everything changes dramatically."
There was a sudden emotion on Winston's face, "Yes, yes... it's a sudden change."
Zach continued to smile, "Newborn babies have to cry for a while before they start to realize that they are born, right? This is the instinct of life." Patted Winston, "This is normal, you You’ll get used to it.”
Winston's expression relaxed a lot, but he still said, "But Hank's life changes didn't take long. He adapted very quickly. Why am I so slow?"
"Because for Hank, he hasn't changed." Zach shrugged, "Grand is still Grand, and he is still him." Zach looked at Winston, "Who are you still Hank?" I don’t know, he’s been extremely self-centered his whole life, the kind of person who doesn’t care about his surroundings.”
The meaning of this sentence... As everyone knows, Hank's personal orientation determines many things. This old man probably has never thought about adapting to the living environment in his whole life, because he, Hank, and the living environment are all created by Hank himself: for example, he and Old Grande’s funeral gray business, such as their coming to the South For example, he agreed to allow vampires and werewolves to live in his home. For example, he asked Frank for the reward of eternal life...
"Hank is very strong." Winston understood what Zach meant. After all, if you want to pursue it, Winston knows what kind of person Hank is better than Zach!
"There are a lot of people like this." Zach tilted his head, thinking of a certain woman Aisela. Forget it, put aside the unpleasant thoughts, "There is no need to be envious or jealous." Zach continued, "The second period of time when I couldn't sleep was after the Secret Alliance encircled Toledo, where I had just escaped to the North Kingdom. period of time."
Winston already understood Zach's logic, "The environment of life has changed again, and you need to adapt."
Zach was very satisfied with Winston's intelligence and nodded, "Yeah." Then he went on to explain another reason for his initial sigh, "You said Xiaobai has caused you a psychological shadow." Zach kept smiling, "My psychological shadow Yes, I am the only one left alive."
Winston opened his mouth. Although the so-called psychological shadow caused by Xiaobai to Winston has a very clear human category, Xiaobai's ultimate side effect on human beings will eventually turn into a living corpse that cannot wake up. But Winston could understand that Zach's meaning had nothing to do with the human category, and the focus was on psychological shadow.
Winston's shadow is the fear of not being able to wake up, and Zach's shadow is waking up and finding that he is alone.
Winston's mouth hung open for a moment, "How did you overcome it?"
"I haven't overcome it." Zach shook his head easily, "I just started to get bored." Zach laughed, "When I get bored, I start to want to do boring things. For example~" Zach looked at Winston blinked, "Rebuild the Toledo clan."
Something to ruin the reputation of vampires.
Winston understands that Zach is the only one left in Toledo. If the shadow is loneliness, then the most direct way is to create an environment where he is no longer lonely.
But the reality is that Zach did not create descendants in the North Kingdom. "You did not rebuild the Toledo clan."
Zach nodded, "I didn't." There was a helpless smile on his face, "I am in a very embarrassing situation. Toledo's requirements for descendants are very clear..." Zach shook his head and said, "What's more, I still have the purpose of rebuilding the clan, and I cannot be like my noble father, who saw a group of refugees and just randomly selected the ones he liked and adopted them as his descendants."
This is said to be Zach's experience when he was human. It's shown here for comparison.
"I am alone and have no privileges. I don't even have a legal status in the North Country. I don't have the ability or energy to support any useless descendants when planning my escape." This is Toledo after being encircled and suppressed. The difference from Toledo before. Zack, it’s been tough.
"In order to find suitable descendants, I had to integrate into the living environment of the Northland and come into contact with all kinds of people." Zach smiled, "And then I accidentally." Zach shook his head again, "In order to find out what I can do to Tori. Many clans originally intended to integrate into society for the purpose of re-emerging and became... "
Winston added for the smiling Zach, "You're real."
Need to say more about Toledo's social skills. Can you imagine a scene in which such a guy with good skin and good inside enters an unfamiliar environment and then blends into it? That's called relaxation, that's called being at ease.
Zach nodded again, "I started living. Alone." Zach adjusted his posture, "I didn't find a suitable descendant, but I found one. It's good to be alone." Looking at Wens Dun, let me talk about some of the thoughts that the tranquility of meditation brought to Zach, "Maybe it's the relationship between Toledo, maybe it's also my original personality. But I found that it's good to live a life where I don't need to serve a group. .”
When Zach once told a story, he said that there were no restrictions on serving the Secret Alliance. His life in the North Country was very free, and he could even spend half a century participating in the life of a human being. This is impossible when you are a Toledo noble and a member of the Secret Alliance.
"I began to consciously avoid any group activities that may have contact with me, and did not participate in any events that had a wide impact..." This led to Craig being in the North Country and unable to find any news about Zach because Zach deliberately avoided it. Any collective idea and state power are also collective. This needs no further explanation. “Enjoy a completely unfettered personal life.”
Winston could still remember the theme of what might have been defined as an enlightening conversation, "And then will you be able to sleep?"
"Sleeping like a baby~" Zach smiled, "Because I know that I have avoided trouble and threats, and the humans around me are harmless to me..." Zach raised his eyebrows, " Creature." Zach paused for a moment, "I still clearly realize that I am a person (Toledo) after waking up, but this awareness is no longer a shadow, it is the reason why I enjoy my current life."
If Emilia were here, she would criticize Zach's behavior as pathological!
As Zach said, he had not overcome his loneliness.
If we change the analogy, everyone will understand what this means.
Instead of correcting his destructive psychology and behavior, a dangerous person with antisocial personality begins to enjoy destroying society.
Is this healthy? No!
Zach is the sociopathic 'dangerous element' who enjoys 'destroying society'.
Tsk, but forget it, don’t judge Zach by human mental health standards, Zach is not a human being!
Winston was a little speechless. He understood the logic of what Zach said, "Well, but how do I turn the side effects of Xiaobai into something worthy of my enjoyment?"
Zach tilted his head, "It all depends on you." Zach used himself as an example, and he also talked about his own experience. Toledo's character determined that Zach discovered the enjoyment of integrating into life. Winston is Lesembra, and the shadow is not something like a clan being wiped out. He can only figure out how to suit himself.
Winston thought quietly to himself for a while, but didn't think of anything useful, but "Thank you." Thank you is a must, at least Zach is willing to say this much to himself. '."
Zach smiled, "You're welcome."
The conversation on this topic ended, but Zach didn't stand up, "Hank has his own way of doing things, so I won't judge, you know." Let's evaluate it. Hank is not a friendly person in life. , do you have any objections? "There are some things that Hank will ignore, or deliberately ignore. Now you are his descendant, Barton, his direct descendant, there are some things..." The reason why Zach did not leave immediately after the conversation ended
After all, Zach returned to his life of working in an interest group. So, what are you resisting? Let the tranquility brought by meditation begin Zach's return journey.
"You have to think about some things for him."
Because Zach's tone changed, Winston became slightly nervous, "What's the matter?"
"You don't want to sleep anyway, why don't you make use of this wasted time." Zach didn't look at Winston, "Did you know that on a night like this, among Barton, there is also a Lesembra who is working hard? Work hard for your own future.”
Ethera.
Winston's reaction was quick, "Secretary to the mayor, that Eisela, the woman who reassigned employees to Grande's halfway house?!" Winston looked a little angry, and his mood was obviously influenced by Hank's direct influence.
Zach nodded, "You should be clear about the relationship between Aisela and Mayor Anthony by now."
Winston nodded, "I know! The blood Hank gave me contains all the information related to Grande! I know all those people and things!"
How convenient~
Zach has decided to serve the collective interests again, but this collective interest is not the Sabbat!
It's Grande, the person next to Zach!
"So you understand what Aisela may be doing with the mayor at this time." Zach gave a hint.
"Well!" Winston's eyes were gloomy, "Probably right next to the mayor's pillow, continue to blow the wind that weakens Grande!"
Zach nodded, "Then why are you still here?"
Winston disappeared.