Dou Xunyu also seemed to return to the house, and the whole person was not very good.
Through his shirt, he randomly touched his waist a few times without purpose, as if he wanted to erase the fingerprints Xu Xilin had left on him. He was infinitely magnified on the basis of "the right place and the right people", and the effects of multiple senses were gathered together. He tossed and turned in bed for half the night, and soiled the sheets the next day.
Dou Xun got up early in the morning and handled his crime secretly. He didn't dare to dry it outside. After washing the parts, he dried it with a hairdryer. Then, before Xu Xilin got up, he made a random excuse and went back to school.
He instinctively felt that he should calm down for a day.
The school during the winter vacation was very sluggish and quiet. The library was open until the 27th of the twelfth lunar month, and it was not closed for the past two days.
Dou Xun sat in the library for a while, and he couldn't read the serious books. He was stunned for a while, then suddenly got up and went under the sociology bookshelf, picking down all the studies related to "homosexuality" , look at each line at a glance.
He sat for a whole day, and when evening came, the library was about to drive people away, so Dou Xun just packed and borrowed the few books he had not finished reading.
He filled a stomach of psychology, ethics, and sociology theory with a southern accent, but he failed to dissect his own problems.
Dou Xun put his hands in his pockets and walked out blankly, asking himself, "So am I gay?"
At this time, the corrupt culture on Internet TV has not had time to become popular, and everyone still believes that there is pure friendship between men and men. It has just been a few years since the issue of sexuality was taken out of the "sick" category in medicine. The stupid science boys are literary and historical. No, words such as "broken sleeve" and "longyang" are just annotations of partial nouns.
The word "homosexuality" is so serious that it makes one's heart skip a beat.
Dou Xun was a little scared, but the degree was not profound. After all, it was not the first day that he was an alien. He was equivalent to a bachelor who had no parents, no brothers, and was a bachelor with no class. There was really nothing to be afraid of… more is dazed.
For his unreferenced future life, for his wish to become clearer every day.
It is up to you to decide how many points you will get in the test, but if you like someone, it depends on whether others are willing to cooperate.
Dou Xun didn't know what Xu Xilin would think of this matter, but instinctively felt that the result might not be very satisfactory.
Suddenly, someone stopped him: "Dou Xun?"
Dou Xun's soul was not there, he glanced back with a blank face, and it took him a long time to recognize that he was the second brother in their dormitory - no way, he was not easy to get acquainted with people, and he lived in the school for a few days. Started "day study", the second brother shaved his head again during the twelfth lunar month, and he almost didn't recognize him.
The second brother's home is out of town, and his parents didn't take his light bulb when they went out for a trip during the Spring Festival. He simply stayed at the school to watch the library, and could earn some pocket money. He waved at Dou Xun, and he asked, "Why do you remember going to school? "
Dou Xun faltered, and casually went over.
He was about to put the words "Spirituality does not belong" on his face. The second brother saw that it was inconvenient for him to ask more. "Love Doctoral Director" Niu, his brain twitched for a while, and stopped him.
"I want to ask you something." Dou Xun organized the language and asked stumblingly, "That... the one you said last time... childhood sweetheart, there is such a person, but I don't know what to do... "
The second brother was confused and stared at Dou Xun for a while, then he reached out his hand in distress and rubbed his head, which was infinitely close to a bald scoop: "Student Dou Xun, you can use human words to explain the meaning of the paragraph just now. Translate it again?"
Fifteen minutes later, Dou Xun helped the second brother clean up the reading room.
The second brother finally understood his doubts in life, and of course, Dou Xun was not too good at it. He omitted the key of the sex of childhood sweethearts.
"You, you... I said what's good about you." The second brother locked the reading room, "Whoever you like doesn't break the law, and we are not uglier than anyone else, even if people don't mean that to you, it's impossible because If you like her, you have a prejudice against you, right? It’s all like you think about it, human beings have long since become extinct, you listen to me, people will chase after them first, if they can’t, they will stalk them, and if they can’t, they will be replaced. Fangcao, the hills next to it are pretty good too!”
Dou Xun closed his mouth, feeling that it was a mistake to ask him, rather than advertised that he was a "doctor of love", this person was more like a "shameless" professional next door.
"If you're afraid of embarrassment when you meet in the future, you should try it out a few times to see what her attitude is." The second brother was quite enthusiastic when he talked about this kind of thing, pointing to Jiang Shan and saying to Dou Xun, "If she doesn't avoid it, it's like acquiescing. , you go back and try, if there is a show come to me again, I will teach you the next step."
Dou Xun, who had learned basic communication skills, said, "Oh, okay, thank you."
I thought to myself: "Fart, stupid x."
Dou Xun spent a day doing nothing at school, and only got a few theoretical books and a bad idea.
And just when he tossed and turned and allocated more time every day to peep at Xu Xilin, the new year came.
Xu Xilin completed a day's study task and was sent to the supermarket by Aunt Du to buy New Year's goods. Dou Xun followed him consciously without any help.
As soon as he went out, Xu Xilin's happiness at home disappeared.
This isn't the first time Xu Jin hasn't gone home for the New Year, but it's the first time she hasn't gone home again.
He has accepted this reality, and knows that no matter how heart-piercing the wound is, it will finally disappear in the ordinary day after day, but at this time, the wound is still showing flesh and blood. Busy and cautiously avoided.
Usually you can avoid it, but every time you miss your relatives during the festive season, you can't dodge, and you have to force a smile at home—because Aunt Du and Grandma Xu also do the same.
He didn't say a word, and Dou Xun didn't have anything to say, so he accompanied him all the way so silently. When he left, Xu Xilin put his hands in his pockets. When he came back, he was carrying too many things, and his fingers turned red after a while. .
Dou Xun took off one of his gloves and threw it over: "One for each person."
Xu Xilin was not polite to him, took it over and put it on, then poured the plastic bag onto one gloved hand, and vacated the other one, and was about to put it in his pocket when Dou Xun grabbed it halfway.
Dou Xun wrapped his fingers with the warm hand he had just taken off the gloves. The temperature of one hand was used in two ways, and the heat inside and outside was distributed to Xu Xilin's two hands.
Xu Xilin struggled reluctantly: "Hey, I'm going, this is too much, did our kindergarten senior class just get out of school?"
Dou Xun held it tightly so that he could not take it away. The two fought awkwardly for a while, sweating on their palms. Xu Xilin finally didn't bother to care about it and gave up. Half open.
He suddenly felt that although the second brother's idea was very dirty, it was not unreasonable.
It's just that Dou Xun doesn't have the chicness of spare tires all over the world. He only recognizes one hill and one grass, so he has to be more cautious.
That night, Dou Xun went back and stayed up all night with his strong action. He even checked the information and added his own thinking, and made a time schedule that fits perfectly. The short-term strategic goal is to finish the college entrance examination in Xu Xilin's summer. After that, through the foreshadowing in the early stage, the confession was smooth.
The table was very precise, and even imagined each of his own temptations and Xu Xilin's possible reactions.
This is the first time in Dou Xun's life that he has taken the initiative in interpersonal relationships, rather than passively accepting the good and bad of others towards him. At first, he was a little nervous, but as soon as this plan was made, he seemed to have a strong theory. Support, all kinds of subtle and elusive things between people seem to have certain rules, and there are traces to follow!
Unfortunately, Dou Xun is completely on paper.
On the first day he started executing this ridiculous schedule with a pair of dark circles under his eyes, Xu Xilin suspected that Dou Xun had taken the wrong medicine—
When Xu Xilin woke up in the morning, his mind was still awake, and he was dazedly filling in the blanks. He basically fell asleep before he finished reading the questions.
Mr. Dou glanced at it, and the expression on his face clearly predicted that he wanted to take the water from the cup and throw Xu Xilin's face.
Mr. Dou lived up to expectations, and really stretched out his hand to the cup. Who knows what he remembered when he raised it, his expression was distorted for a long time, he actually lowered his head and drank the water, and then forcibly suppressed his violent temper, showing a twisted smile that gritted his teeth. Xu Xilin took the pen from his hand: "I'll tell you from the beginning."
Xu Xilin didn't use cold water to splash it, and was awakened alive by his bitter and bitter smile.
During this winter vacation, Dou Xun became more and more wrong in Xu Xilin's eyes - the "keep calm" he understood was probably not the same as his own actual behavior.
Dou Xun has been sticking to Xu Xilin for longer and longer. He wakes him up every morning until he closes the door before going to bed to see guests off. He can't wait to follow him to the toilet. Xu Xilin is going crazy, and he doesn't even feel it at all. . Dou Xun also sits next to Xu Xilin with a book standing upright every day, pretending to read it attentively. In fact, he does not turn a page for a long time, his eyes wander for a while, and he secretly glances at Xu Xilin.
After Xu Xilin found out, he didn't speak up, and he wondered in his heart - he didn't know whether he was dying from a terminal illness soon, or if he had a tyrant flower on his face.
So one day, when Dou Xun went downstairs to pick up the courier, Xu Xilin finally couldn't help but secretly opened the "Level 6 Listening Analysis" that Dou Xun had been watching for more than a month.
"Level 6 Listening Analysis" is just a fake cover, which contains an old book with yellowed pages - "The Virgin of Flowers", authored by Jean Genet.
The ignorant Xu Xilin had never heard of it, and he didn't know what made Dou Xun so sneaky. As the computer next to him was on, he quickly googled it.
…then his expression went blank for a moment, and he put the book back as it was.