It’s fine to go out with Hu Peng Gou friends in the weekend of the third year of high school, but I still drank wine, which is a bit difficult to explain, so Xu Xilin’s original intention was to “enter the village quietly, and don’t shoot guns”, but it was leaked by the family’s ancestor Bird and Dou Xun together. trace. He had to be next to Aunt Du and grandmother chattering from side to side, and dragged Dou Xun upstairs sweating profusely.
Aunt Du: "Look at it, don't drop him."
Xu Xilin quickly turned around and waved his hand: "It's okay, you don't need to worry about it."
Seeing that someone was supporting it, the grey parrot kept his mouth shut, but Dou Xun was unwilling to give up, and he went upstairs halfway up the stairs one by one. He turned his head solemnly, stretched out two fingers, and gestured. The gesture of a gun, pointing to the grey parrot on the shelf, announced: "Kill you."
After he finished speaking, he "fired". Considering the problem of recoil, he gestured to fire, raised the "muzzle", and then went upstairs arrogantly and coldly.
Xu Xilin: "..."
Impressed.
When Dou Xun went upstairs, he still recognized the door. He entered the house by himself with his eyes half-closed. He walked to the bed and smashed himself down like a coffin board. Xu Xilin suspected that he had hit his head and rushed in to check. After reading it again, he saw that the blush on Dou Xun's face had faded, and his face was pale and pale, lying on his back on the bed, the "armed" in his right hand had not been removed, and he was staring straight at the ceiling, facing the Shot by shot.
Xu Xilin has seen people who drink too much, people who cry, people who laugh, people who drink alcohol and make people disgusting... But it's really a good experience to shoot around without saying a word.
Xu Xilin fiddled with him, sweating all over, sat down on the chair next to him, picked up a thin notebook and fanned it wildly, and waited for three minutes, seeing that Dou Xun didn't want to stop, it was so much fun, so cheap Xidi teased beside him: "Bean paste, who will be shot?"
Comrade Dou Xun's revolutionary will is firm, even if he has become a sharpshooter Zorro, his mouth is still very strict, and he can't easily get his words out.
Xu Xilin moved a chair and leaned over, fanning Dou Xun with the book, briefly attracting those dull eyes.
Xu Xilin: "Do you still know me?"
Dou Xun was silent.
Xu Xilin thought about it, and casually took advantage of him: "I'm your brother, please call me 'brother'."
Dou Xun stared at him for a while with a puzzled expression, as if he was recalling when he had a new brother, and he wanted to call him or not. Xu Xilin had to make an inch: "It's okay if you don't call me brother, just call me dad."
Dou Xun's face changed when he heard the sound, and he pointed at Xu Xilin's forehead: "I'll kill you."
Xu Xilin first slapped the bed with laughter, then laughed for a while, then he slowly figured out that the gun was not a good taste, so he couldn't laugh anymore.
Xu Xilin: "Your father and mother..."
Dou Xun gave him two shots with no expression on his face. He didn't shoot at random, but pointed at the head. Xu Xilin held his head and looked at him for a while. Half a day is not over yet.
Xu Xilin had always felt that Dou Xun was irritable and willful, but only now did he realize that it was the result of restraint.
He hates society so much, and if he doesn't restrain himself, he might have already organized school shootings.
Xu Xilin asked softly, "Where's Xu Xilin? Is he also dead?"
Dou Xun listened, poked his index finger on his forehead, and looked at him without blinking, but he didn't make the move to raise the "muzzle" after firing the gun. A faint smell of wine wafted out, Xu Xilin smelled it for a while, and felt a little dizzy too.
After a long stalemate, Dou Xun suddenly showed a painful look on his face. He suddenly threw his hand to the side, turned over in a fit of anger, and struggled on the bed for a while. On his chest, he pressed his stomach again, then turned himself over to lie on his side, with his back facing Xu Xilin, curled up into a big shrimp.
Xu Xilin sat quietly beside him for a while, and understood the body language—you made me very painful, but I still couldn't bear to kill you like other pains, so I had to endure it half-dead.
Xu Xilin's heart suddenly felt very uncomfortable. He put down the notebook used for fan fanning, and slowly reached out to grab Dou Xun's hand. The drunkard's body temperature was very high and it was hot. The Dou Xun actually turned around following his strength very honestly.
Xu Xilin raised his other hand in the air for a long time, then carefully placed it on Dou Xun's neck, and touched his face lightly. Dou Xun immediately narrowed his eyes sensitively, and subconsciously his hand rub rub.
Xu Xilin somehow remembered what Dou Xun did last time when he "tested whether he burned or not". He pursed his lips slightly and asked Dou Xun, "Are you a little feverish?"
Dou Xun squeezed his hand with some strength.
Xu Xilin hesitated for a while, and found a "justifiable reason" for himself: "I'm just afraid that he has a fever."
He thought so, and pressed his lips to Dou Xun's forehead. Xu Xilin's only skill in testing body temperature in his life is to use a thermometer. He has no idea about the temperature at all. His hands don't work, and his mouth naturally doesn't have the intelligence to go anywhere. It's conceivable that he didn't try anything, but he was in this posture. I felt a strange intimacy.
Xu Xilin's heartbeat suddenly accelerated, and he ran wildly.
Just then, footsteps were heard outside.
The stairwell is covered with wooden floors, and there is a "crunching" sound when people step on it. Xu Xilin was taken aback and raised his head suddenly.
Aunt Du was worried about the boy's age, which would be inconvenient. She wouldn't come to their room if she had nothing to do. She would say hello in advance if she wanted to clean. She just knocked on the door and said at the door, "You can't lie down directly after drinking. Auntie soaked some warm honey water and yogurt, put it on the small table outside, see which one is comfortable to eat, take it yourself."
Xu Xilin responded quickly and wanted to go out to get it. When he stood up, he found that Dou Xun was still holding his hand.
Xu Xilin whispered a little uncomfortably, "I'll go get something."
Dou Xun didn't know if he understood or not, but he still held onto him, his fingers slightly lighter. Xu Xilin pulled out his hand, and then Dou Xun's expression darkened.
Xu Xilin coughed dryly and didn't dare to look at him again. He quickly went out and grabbed a glass of something, and shoved it into Dou Xun's hand: "Drink it."
Then he went back to his house without looking back.
Xu Xilin's back was soaked with sweat, and there was a tendon in his neck. He didn't know what was wrong, and kept jumping around. He blinked, and a drop of sweat on his forehead blinked down, running down the bridge of his nose.
Xu Xilin was stunned for a while, took a lukewarm battle bath, then returned to the desk, picked up Xu Jin's photo frame, and thought in confusion, "What should I do?"
After a while, he felt that he was a little ridiculous. Even if his mother was still alive, he didn't dare to ask her out loudly. Now that her mother was gone, he was relying on it after realizing it. She comes.
Xu Xilin decided not to go to school. He made a few papers by himself to calm down. When he was done, he looked up and it was past eleven o'clock. Auntie Du cut the fruit and didn't dare to disturb him. It has oxidized to a yellowish color. The difference between my aunt and my mother is that my mother will push the door into the house without any scruples and put down the fruit.
Xu Xilin ate a couple of bites at random. His alcohol intake was not bad, but he was prone to insomnia as soon as he drank. He was obviously very tired. He was tossing and turning in bed, and finally he was still restless. He got up lightly and slipped into Dou Xun's house to watch At a glance, I saw that he had slept honestly, put the empty cup aside, and knew that he had put on a thin quilt and his face was normal, so he was relieved, and then he left more and more worried.
He and himself couldn't deceive themselves. After wandering for a long time, he was always guilty of what he had just done. After thinking about it for a long time, he even considered what his grandmother would look like if she knew about these messes.
As the old saying goes, parents cannot accompany their children for the rest of their lives, and of course grandparents don’t need to expect. If it's gone, he'll really be left alone, and will anyone care about his sexual orientation
Thinking of this, Xu Xilin's heart changed from embarrassment to desolation.
Everyone is a little hypocritical, and someone like Dou Xun who dares to break the jar is just the indifference brewed from years of disappointment and accustomed to it, and his heart may not be comfortable.
Xu Xilin's hypocrisy is even more complicated. He has spent too much time doing what he wants, and has developed a greed that although he is not strong, he wants to take everything. He wants to play with his classmates, but also He will pay attention to maintaining his grades, and relying on a little bit of cleverness, although his grades are not outstanding, he can still take care of it... Over time, he feels that everything in the world can be like this.
Xu Xilin wanted to live a free and unrestrained life, and was unwilling to wrong himself, but he didn't dare to go completely deviant, because he was used to being a top student who didn't need to worry about him. He was like a pet in captivity, even if there was no rope around his neck, he would not defected to the wild. Xu Xilin wanted the best of both worlds, and wanted a great reunion that would take all aspects into consideration. However, today, he found that he was not able to do it—he wanted Dou Xun, and he didn't want homosexuality.
He wanted the boy who walked with him through the house to get together and scattered, and he didn't want to be stabbed in the back and scolded as a pervert.
Xu Xilin thought about it in a mess for a long time, and then fell asleep in a confused way. He also had a messy dream. When he woke up, he forgot the plot, but he couldn't help but feel sad.
Although Dou Xun was really drunk that day, it's hard to say if his memory is broken. Xu Xilin suspected that Dou Xun remembered that day, because he increased the frequency of going home three times a week—he signed up at the boxing gym in the community gym.
The gym is an annual card, and most of the people who take advantage of him go in and apply for the card on a whim, and then the coaches are put on the shelf before they are familiar with each other. Only Dou Xun, who fights Muay Thai twice a week and never misses class, rain or shine. He also DIYed a piece of equipment at home—he took an iron rod, tied it with sponge at both ends for easy handling, and tied a thick rope in the middle, and hung heavy objects on the rope, usually a drink bottle filled with water.
When Xu Xilin entered the final sprint stage of the college entrance examination, Mr. Dou, the companion reading, was exercising beside him when he had nothing to do. He stretched his arms straight, grasped the ends of the stick with both hands, and turned the iron rod with both hands to hold the rope hanging with heavy objects one by one. Put it down, turn it up again and again, repeat 120 laps, rest for five minutes, and do another round. It is said that it can exercise both wrist strength and arm strength... But Xu Xilin took it over and played for a while, and felt that this Things are prone to tenosynovitis.
Dou Xun is not a person who loves sports. Xu Xilin suspected that he was stimulated by the incident at the door of Banyue Banwan that day, but he never dared to ask.
After that day, Xu Xilin and Dou Xun's relationship changed slightly. The two were a little careful with each other, and the excessive physical contact and verbal confrontation were put away, which greatly reduced the frequency of quarrels and made peace a lot. The two of them each looked at the "enemy's position", not knowing whether the next step was war or peace.
The college entrance examination countdown board on the back blackboard can be used faster than toilet paper. One pump and one pump will soon see the bottom. These days, the big test is followed by the quiz. By the end of the test, the students are basically numb to the test, and their hearts are gradually floating. .
Cai Jing was the first to come and the last to leave every day. It was his job to open and lock the door.
It was usually very early, but Monday was earlier than usual - he was going to put the gift for Luo Bing into the mailbox while no one was in the school.
This has almost become Cai Jing's psychological sustenance. His uncle is becoming more and more inhuman. Every day, he either disappears or makes the house smell of wine lees. Cai Jing avoids him and wants to make a floor in the classroom.
When Xu Xilin was obviously depressed, everyone else was afraid to stimulate him, but Cai Jing didn't take it seriously, because Xu Xilin still had a grandmother at home, even if his mother was gone, their family could still afford a nanny, and he still bought what he liked. Don't worry about tuition fees, don't calculate what to eat in the cafeteria to save money.
Cai Jing seemed to be a child who grew up in the open air in the wind and snow. His flesh was repeatedly chapped, and layers of rough scars and dead skin grew, and he had lost part of his ability to perceive pain.
Cai Jing sighed at the rusted iron door of the mailbox and thought, "Just get through this."
If he can go to university, his wings will be hard, and he will be able to run his own way and get rid of his current life.
After Cai Jing left, a skinny boy sneaked out of the dormitory next to him. If Dou Xun was there, he would probably be recognized as the boys Li Bozhi and the others had beaten in the toilet on the second floor of the school.
Like a little mouse, he tiptoed to the mailbox of a class, holding a wire in his hand, and stabbed the lock of the mailbox for a while tremblingly.
The mailbox is exposed to the wind and the sun all the year round, and the lock is just a decoration. It is not a villain. It was opened by the boy a few times. He sneakily glanced around and took the envelope that Cai Jing had just stuffed into it. came out, turned and ran.
Because Wu Tao got his professional grades, he didn't need to train every day, and because he was approaching the college entrance examination, his family finally took some money out and rented a room for him at the school gate. He has already moved out. Li Bozhi, the dormitory of the dormitory building, is in a very bad mood recently. It's bad, it's unlucky to catch someone, someone like him at the bottom of the food chain can't resist, and can only detour to save himself.
Usually Li Bozhi and the others got up early in training, and they would poke him up every day to ask him to buy breakfast for the quilt. The boys had already noticed Cai Jing who came to stuff things every Monday. He had heard people say about this little four-eyed, Wu Tao and his class, especially they would go to the camp and work everywhere.
In the second semester of high school, Wu Tao and the others took turns to help him take classes for nearly a semester. Li Bozhi still laughed behind his back, saying that Wu Tao was an idiot for his righteousness.
"He must be rich," thought the boy who stole.
The next night, during self-study at night, Cai Jing gave himself extra classes as usual. He didn't leave until ten o'clock. The entire teaching building was empty, and the lights in each class were turned off. He walked out of the empty corridor by himself. I saw a few people gathered at the door.
Cai Jing glanced at it and saw that it was Li Bozhi's group. Without Xu Xilin and Wu Tao, Cai Jing didn't want to have anything to do with this group of people. He lowered his head and pretended not to see it. He walked around them. Who knows, just a few steps away, there was a sudden "hey" behind him, and something fell from the sky. It was smashing in front of Cai Jing.
It was Cai Jing's unsigned letter to Luo Bing.
Li Bozhi struttingly brought people over: "My buddy picked up something, is it yours?"
Cai Jing made a "buzz" in his head, and involuntarily clenched the strap of his schoolbag.
Li Bozhi kicked the envelope on the ground, and said to Cai Jing with a half-smiling smile, "It's not unreasonable for others to collect money, so if you lose something, you have to show it? But I've also heard people say that you're not very comfortable... What should I do?"
Li Bozhi pretended to think for a while, then stretched out a slap and slapped Cai Jing on the shoulder heavily: "Why don't you do me a favor? Even if we are both settled, how about it?"