"Afterwards, I had new anxiety every day. For example, I was over thirty and couldn't stand, and I was still a idle gangster. When I closed my eyes, I couldn't count my past achievements, and I couldn't see any future in the future."
"I often delusion that I have the opportunity to become rich overnight this year and next year, or delusion that all the things around me are an upside down dream, and when I wake up, I am still the poor boy of sixteen or seven years old. In short, it may be unsatisfactory in reality. There are a lot of places."
"However, anxiety can be considered a kind of busyness at the moment. It is better than doing nothing. Because I have so much anxiety now, I only think of those things in the middle of the night when I am insomniac - such as the boy next to me neglecting to put the girl's letter on the scratch paper. In the middle of the night, such as the bad boy with blurred faces blocking the way home in the middle of the night, the empty iron box, the watermelon knife... These things seem to be stuck between my 'consciousness' and 'subconsciousness', I often feel I forgot about them all myself, but they were always stuck in my throat."
At this time, Dou Xun heard the door slam, and hurriedly threw aside the booklet he had printed and went to pick up someone at the door.
The booklet is printed on A4 paper, and the title is "The Dirty Ascetic". The author is Cai Jing. Taking advantage of the east wind of the city's tourist season in autumn, my grandfather's flower shop has become popular, and Cai Jing's own book is also included. Hu Zhao's story book also gained some popularity, and soon a bookseller came to him and wanted to publish this semi-autobiographical new book for him.
Before Cai Jing submitted the manuscript, he edited and proofread a copy, which was borrowed by Dou Xun to read it in advance.
At this point, as an outsider, Dou Xun vaguely understood the ins and outs of Cai Jing's murder from the veiled words.
He took a bunch of daily necessities that Xu Xilin bought from the supermarket and asked, "Where are your dad and the others?"
Xu Xilin: "The Sheraton in the west."
Zheng Shuo didn't know what was wrong, so he took the whole family back to China for a trip. He later married a foreign woman and gave birth to a little girl of mixed blood. The little girl was a beautiful embryo, and she was chatting all the way, causing Xu Xilin to have a headache.
Taking advantage of Dou Xun's hand being occupied by something, he did something wrong, and he caught his cold paw into Dou Xun's collar by surprise: "Cover your husband's hand."
Dou Xun decided to meet him in general today, and threw the half-organized supermarket plastic bag on the table.
Xu Xilin found out that something was wrong, he rolled the cigarette when he saw it, "Ow": "My lord, I was wrong!"
It's a pity that before he could retreat, he was hugged by Dou Xun, and he pressed him on the sofa again and again.
Dou Xun put one knee on his side and pressed his elbows on both of his hands: "Where do you want me to cover your hands?"
Xu Xilin: "..."
Dou Xun sneered: "What are you doing? Do you want to apply for a card again?"
Xu Xilin, who was quite lively when he was a child, has long changed his love for "playing" to "watching", and gradually became an urbanite who likes to lie at home in his spare time. The biggest activity he usually involves is playing golf— The basic steps are to shovel a shovel of shit first, and then walk with a group of uncles and uncles of three highs to the next place to shovel shit. When the sun gets bigger, they have to take a car, and they can walk at most 10,000 steps in a day, and that's it, Going home and screaming.
On the contrary, Dou Xun, who was relatively quiet when he was a child, is a very long-term person. He will keep the habits he has developed, and he will always like things he likes. He was blocked by gangsters at the door of Yuebanwan once before. He started exercising in the boxing gym by mistake, but he has persevered for so many years. So far, two sets of his gi are still hanging in the bedroom.
Kung fu is useless, and robbery is not so easy to encounter. Dou Xun's skills are all used to bully Xu Xilin.
Every time Xu Xilin gritted his teeth and prepared to "revenge", and then he would go out to get a fitness card the next day. Unfortunately, the average person is often determined, and one card cannot be used once on average - later, he used it as a bookmark for Dou Xun.
Xu Xilin: "Dr. Dou, people should rely on friendly negotiation - simply reasoning to solve problems. It is very barbaric to resort to violence at every turn."
Dou Xun nodded in agreement: "You're right, but when have I resorted to violence against you? I've never resorted to only the flesh."
Xu Xilin thought about it for a while, but in the middle of it, he accidentally thought crooked, and a thin layer of red that was not very obvious jumped up on the base of his ears.
He was at a loss for words, and then his wandering eyes triggered a chain reaction - Dou Xun unfortunately followed him and thought crookedly.
The grey parrot learnt to coax beside him: "Resume the flesh!"
Xu Xilin: "Go away!"
Dou Xun: "Go away!"
The grey parrot gave a very aggrieved cry.
When a strange sound came from the next bedroom, the parrot often hummed "Gong Xi Fa Cai" to strengthen himself - although he couldn't remember why he wanted to sing this song with his brain capacity, the habit he had developed could not be changed.
At this time, the gray parrot looked at the postures of the two, and suddenly felt blessed, and opened his mouth and said, "Congratulations..."
Dou Xun got off Xu Xilin embarrassedly: "I will stew it sooner or later!"
Xu Xilin couldn't help laughing.
Dou Xun patted his lower abdomen, and suddenly asked without warning, "By the way, has Luo Bing ever written you a love letter?"
Xu Xilin was halfway through laughing, and was interrogated unexpectedly, his breath stuck in his throat, and he coughed to the death.
"Where is it... Luo Bing?" He struggled to get up, "Didn't you still have the red envelope that Luo Bing gave you when she got married?"
Dou Xun: "I mean when you were in high school, did you write it?"
Xu Xilin raised his eyebrows, stretched out his hand and rubbed his chin, put his elbow on the knee that stood up, and said, "A handsome boy like me, the girl who wrote me a love letter has a reinforcement platoon, who remembers that? "
Dou Xun didn't know if he was talking about him or not, but with the scattered memories of this person, I'm afraid he might have left his juvenile feelings behind, and asked angrily, "What can you remember?"
Xu Xilin said without hesitation, "You."
Dou Xun froze for a moment, stumblingly said "I" once and "you" twice, and finally couldn't make a sentence, so embarrassed that his heart was burning. The heart, liver, spleen and stomach are connected together.
Xu Xilin this great scourge!
Fortunately, the call came at this time and saved Dr. Dou, who was blushing.
Zheng Shuo called and thanked Xu Xilin.
Dou Xun was sorting out the supermarket bag that he had just thrown aside when he heard Xu Xilin say politely to the other side: "Well... We will go there tomorrow morning. If you want to come together, I will pick you up then... No, no trouble, thank you."
The next day was the anniversary of Ms. Xu Jin's death.
More than a year ago, Dou Xun secretly took a taxi and followed Xu Xilin into the cemetery, looking at his grandmother without embarrassment or embarrassment.
Now, he can finally sit in Xu Xilin's co-pilot openly, buy flowers while he is parked, and entertain Zheng Shuo's family for him.
Zheng Shuo is much more particular than Dou Junliang. He came to the cemetery and changed his clothes on purpose. He was very polite to Dou Xun.
The mixed-race little girl didn't speak Chinese very well. Hanging in her mother's hands, she circled in circles, looking curiously at the chrysanthemums bubbling with cold water vapor.
Zheng Shuo raised the flower basket a little to prevent her from pulling: "Have you thought about how to live without children in the future?"
"Brother Song said that if he had a second child in the future, he would give it to us. The sister-in-law didn't say anything, but Xu Xilin didn't agree." Dou Xun led Zheng Shuo and the others to the cemetery, "How can other people's children be so easy to bring?"
In fact, Xu Xilin's original words were "I have a cat and a bird at home, enough for me, another bear child, I can't live anymore".
"Besides, the times are different, and the old family life will be difficult to reproduce in the future." Dou Xun looked back at the little girl led by a foreign woman and smiled at her, "Children always leave independently when they grow up. , when the time comes, there will still be two people staring at each other with big eyes and small eyes. The result is the same with or without children. The difference is the process, but two people together, although they can't do this, it's not nothing else, don't you think?"
Zheng Shuo was actually a little speechless.
The five people lingered in front of Xu Jin's tomb for a while, standing side by side, very nondescript. Zheng Shuo tried to speak several times, but finally he still didn't know what to say - when Xu Jin was alive, he was able to say it, let alone no one. After so many years, in the end, I just put a bunch of flowers and bowed to my grandmother. I had done my best, so I said goodbye and left on my own.
Looking at the back of the family of three, Xu Xilin suddenly remembered: "Do I have a younger sister who is likely to grow into a great beauty in the future... or is it a kiss?"
It's not that he is slow to respond, but it is difficult for him to put Zheng Shuo into the role of his family. His daughter, in his opinion, is similar to "the child of an acquaintance", and it always takes a long time to reflect the blood relationship. .
Dou Xun wiped Xu Jin's tombstone silently, squatted on the ground, sprayed some water on the two baskets of flowers, and asked him, "Is there anything else to say?"
Xu Xilin shook his head silently, the living people have too many things in their hearts, so there is no need to complain to the dead.
Dou Xun naturally took his hand: "Auntie, let's go."
Xu Xilin nailed his feet to the ground and refused to move.
Dou Xun first looked back at him inexplicably, and then after a while, inexplicably understood his look.
Dou Xun turned around and said it again seriously: "Mom, we're leaving."
The photo of Xu Jin on the tombstone gave him a meaningful smile.