In fact, sometimes I admit that I become particularly timid when it comes to my feelings for her.
I can't say the words "I like you" for many years.
But maybe it's because of my forbearance that I can always stay by her side no matter how many years have passed.
But I didn't expect that Fang He would appear halfway through our lives.
When I first saw Fang He, I knew he could steal my light.
It's not because he is prettier than me, but because of his peach blossom eyes and the upward curve of the corners of his mouth.
He is the complete opposite of me...
His enthusiasm and radicalness made me feel inexplicably irritated, but there was also a hint of... envy.
Yes, I envy him.
I envy him that he can approach her without hesitation and express his love so desperately.
But I... can't do it.
At that time, I felt like I was stuck in the quagmire of an abyss. I tried desperately to escape, but I couldn't get ashore no matter what.
During that time, I couldn't concentrate as long as I heard Fang He's voice.
His brisk tone was like a deep mockery, which made me feel... I was about to lose her.
The only person who used to be by her side was me, but now...
At that time, I actually hoped that Fang He could disappear from this world forever and never exist again.
I don’t know if it’s because my resentment is too deep, or because Fang He’s own fate is too bad.
He really disappeared, or it cannot be said that he disappeared, but became a "vegetative state".
I heard that he got into a car accident on the way to buy flowers for her. It was Chinese Valentine's Day that day, so he probably wanted to confess to her!
In the dark side of my heart, there was an inexplicable secret of joy. At least, he can no longer take her away.
Although I know that I can't have her. Because I know that this matter must have an impact on her, so I can't become a problem for her at this time.
I think I can wait, wait for the day when Fang He wakes up, or wait for us to graduate and reach an age where we need to start a family and start a career.
But what I didn't expect was that I wouldn't be able to wait for that day.
My family was targeted by fellow competitors, who used illegal means to maliciously slander our company, causing our stock to plummet.
But my parents are very prestigious in the business circle, and they activated emergency plans very quickly, and the company was quickly stabilized.
But what they didn't expect was that they actually killed him directly.
When I received the call from my uncle, I knew there would be no future between her and me.
It turns out that I was the first person to leave, not her...
Once upon a time, I always thought that I would stay by her side forever. No matter what happens, even if the person she chooses to marry in the end is not me, I can always stay with her.
I never thought that leaving her would become a decision for me.
When I was sitting on the plane, I could feel that my feet might run off the cabin at any time, and then forget all hatred and stay with her.
But I know I can't do this.
There are always many choices in life, and every choice is so difficult.
And that choice was the most difficult choice I have ever made in my life, bar none.
Life in the United States was much harder than I imagined. My parents left me a sum of money, but this money was stored in a specific bank. The leaders who killed my parents always sent people to keep an eye on the bank.
I know they want to catch me and get rid of me quickly.
After all, it's for the money. In a country where guns are freely available, killing one or two people is not a big deal to them. (To be continued)