Song Qingwan pulled her lips and smiled:
"Besides, that kid leaves early and returns late every day. I don't know what he's busy with. The Lu family is like a haunted house with no one in it. It's deserted."
"I was thinking at the time that it would be good for Lu Anran to marry, at least she would have Yu Zheng to accompany her, and she would have someone she could rely on for the rest of her life, but that kid Lu Junhan didn't, he was alone, and I How can you rest assured!"
Lu Anran at the door closed her eyes, tears streaming down her face, she never thought that her aunt would think so.
Lu Junhan also pursed his thin lips, his deep and dark eyes darkened a little.
As Song Qingwan spoke, it seemed as if she had returned to that time again, her eyes were red again, and even her hoarse voice was choked up:
"I thought, he doesn't like women, and he doesn't like children, but at least he won't be lonely if he has a child. If I leave, what will he do by himself? So, I started desperately Urging him to find a woman to have a child, and, at the time, I also thought, if I could take a look at Lu Junhan or Lu Anran's child before I died, I would die without regret."
Lu Qidong raised his head and closed his eyes, but his eye sockets turned red again.
Song Qingwan took a deep breath and smiled again, "But I was very lucky. A few months before I was about to die, I met Lili. Although she was not a boy, that little girl was so cute, she was two years younger than me. The appearance of the child I thought of years ago was even cuter, so it doesn’t matter if it’s a boy or not, at that time I felt that there would be no regrets in dying.”
Lu Qidong was severely stunned.
He originally thought that Song Qingwan wanted to die only because she was suddenly afraid of pain, so she made the decision, but he didn't expect that Song Qingwan had already had this idea a few months ago!
At that time, she no longer wanted to be cured, and began to wait for death slowly!
In fact, he is the one who understands her best.
At that time, he also thought about giving up, because it was too painful, and that kind of pain was not something people could bear.
Song Qingwan has been ill for at least three or four years.
In the past few years, I suffered from weakness and severe pain from chemotherapy. Every time I went to the operating table, my body was cut.
And the feeling of being trapped in a hospital bed, not free, and as if the body is being pricked by dense needles, really makes life worse than death!
It can be endured once or twice, but if you do it too often, you will be afraid.
Song Qingwan said again at this time:
"But, brother, look, how good it is now. Brother, you have come back to life, and I can see your last side. I will die without regret. That kid Lu Junhan already has a child, and he is so cute and sensible. I also know how to take care of her father. I will die without regret. Dad often goes back to Lu’s house to fish and eat with us, just like when we were young, I have no regrets when we are together as a family. And In the past few days, Lu Anran has also started to go back to Lu's house, and she no longer hides in her room, and my last knot is about to be resolved, really... Look how good it is now! At the beginning, there was no one in the Lu's house, Now the whole Lu family has slowly returned. The previous Lu family was at most an empty house, unlike now, everyone always gathers together, you see... no, there is nothing better than now. "
Lu Qidong looked at her, gritted his teeth fiercely, not to let himself whimper.
Song Qingwan's eyes were filled with tears, and she laughed, she said softly:
"So, I really don't have any regrets now, and even my current life is something I didn't even dare to imagine two years ago. This is much better than the ending I thought of before I died two years ago, really , At that moment, I was thinking, if I go, if one or two people can come to the hospital bed, I will be thankful."
Lu Anran outside the door couldn't hold back, she covered her mouth tightly, but tears kept falling down her eyes, crying sobbingly.
She regrets it.
In the past three years, she should come back often.
She shouldn't forget to go home in order to pay off the debt as soon as possible and earn money desperately.
Just like what my aunt told her before, I can paint at any time, but some people, if they don't accompany me now, in the future... maybe they really won't have the chance to accompany them again.
My aunt was talking about my father at the time, saying that my father was old and didn't have much time. Let them be children, and sometimes come back to accompany him more. Perhaps, my aunt was not only talking about my father, but also... herself.
My aunt didn't have much time for herself.
Song Qingwan: "In fact, in the past two years, I have been reflecting on it all the time. I feel that I have failed in my life. The Lu family has not developed well, and I have to rely on that kid Lu Junhan to do it myself. I did not protect the Lu family well, which led to The Lu family was torn apart, and in the blink of an eye, Lu Junhan had grown into such a withdrawn and silent character, but Lu Anran hadn't grown up at all, and was still so weak and weak. I sometimes thought, if I die, you will be down there. Blame me for what to do... "
Lu Qidong closed his eyes, "You are the sister I love the most, how could I blame you."
When Lu Qidong woke up, seeing that Lu Anran and Lu Junhan had grown up safely, he didn't want anything else, he only wanted the children to be safe, and Song Qingwan had already done it.
Song Qingwan didn't reply, just smiled, with tears in her eyes:
"Brother, now that you are awake, you must be able to do better than me, not only to develop the Lu family, but also to teach the two children, and I believe you will treat Lili very well, you are so gentle and smart , you can definitely teach Lili to be the best and kindest girl in Haicheng, so I really have no regrets."
"But I have!"
Lu Qidong's eyes were red, his voice was hoarse,
"I couldn't sleep last night, so I asked someone to check your living materials for more than ten years. After reading it, do you know what I regret the most? What I regret the most is that I was thinking, why didn't the little Both An Ran and Xiao Hanhan were brought into the car, I know this idea is too ruthless and cold-blooded, but I really think so."
Song Qingwan was stunned, and just looked at him so firmly, Lu Qidong closed his eyes, took a breath, and continued in a hoarse voice:
"You are my sister, and I treat you as my own sister! I never felt that you owed me. I brought you into the Lu family voluntarily, and you don't owe me anything, so there is no need for you to repay My kindness, to raise Xiao Hanhan and Xiao Anran! Even if you throw them away, don't want them, it's okay, this is your right as my sister, their father is me, and I am the one who should be responsible for them. I'm sorry for them, it's not you! They are not your responsibility, and you shouldn't have to bear them alone. I regret it too much. If I knew this was the result, I... "
Lu Qidong couldn't continue.
He loves little Anran and Xiao Hanhan, but he also loves Song Qingwan.