The appearance of Ruxue undoubtedly allowed me to see a ray of sunshine in the whirlpool of sadness, illuminating my heart that had been in pain.
When she let go of me, I finally couldn't help but kneel on the ground and let my tears flow. I cried until I couldn't help myself. My growth trajectory was always accompanied by Master. How could I be so easy to live with each other for so many days? Erase
At this moment, all the fatal memories turned into sadness and turned into tears, flowing down my cheeks.
This is not my own sadness, it is the sadness of everyone present. Everyone has lost the most important person in their lives. That kind of sadness is like a resonance at the moment, hovering over the small bamboo forest, and then turning into everyone Personal tears.
"Sister, forgive me, just once." Ruyue suddenly said this, and then hugged me from behind regardless. My body stiffened, and then I saw Qinhuai's helpless and sad smile, and turned around almost at the same time as Ruxue. .
"Third brother, don't move. Just pretend that you were carrying me when you were a child, and I lay on your back. When we met, Grandpa Jiang and Grandma were both there. We were so reckless that we went to the Tomb of the Hungry Ghost privately, because We all feel in our hearts that we have someone to rely on, Grandpa Jiang and Grandma Jiang. They are here, they will save us, tolerate our naughtiness, and in the end they will give us a lesson at most and be reluctant to do anything to us." Ruyue leaned against my back. Back said intermittently.
I let tears flow freely and listened to her slowly telling: "Such a feeling, third brother, you and I are experiencing the same dependence from childhood to adulthood. So how can they make us so dependent, but Leaving suddenly again? It feels like being abandoned. But, third brother, there is one thing I have never told you. At that time in the Tomb of Hungry Ghosts, we were lost and encountered so many things. You were the one who took us all the way. We, until I was rescued by Uncle Hu. From that time on, you have become my dependence, without grandma, without Grandpa Jiang, and you. So, you must cheer up, no matter what they leave With this kind of idea, if you are determined not to give up, you can become the dependence of everyone and take us to find them, even if we only meet them once."
Find them, even just meet them once? My heart skipped a beat and I murmured, "Can you find it?"
At this time, Chengzhen rushed in front of me and said: "Brother Chengyi, you are the descendant of the Shanzi lineage, and you are our senior brother. My master has said since he was a child that if something big happens to our lineage, After all, we still need Shanzimai to come forward and support us. If we can find them, you can lead us to find them."
Brother Chengxin also came over at this time, took off his eyes, wiped away his tears with his usual elegant gesture, and said: "Chengyi, you are indeed the senior brother. They are gone, and you will lead our lineage." Now, my master also said, don’t be afraid if something big happens, there will naturally be mountain-shaped veins that can hold up half of the sky, and the rest of our veins just need to help you vigorously."
I gently pushed Ruyue away, wiped away my tears, stood up, and said: "I ask myself if I am immature, because until now, I am still stuck in sadness and can't extricate myself. Why do you believe in me so much? Just because I Is it Shanzimai?"
"Shanzimai, Chengyi, do you know why it is called Shanzimai? The people who come from the mountains are what they are, they are immortals. Master once said that the master is not showing favoritism to anyone when he considers Shanzimai to be the greatest. But Shanzimai is the source and orthodoxy of Taoism, and it is the person who walks on the metaphysical road. And when one person attains Taoism, chickens and dogs ascend to heaven, it makes it clear, in fact, it is thought that Shanzimai finally touches something higher and protects others. People of several lines. Everyone who truly has the Taoist lineage of Shanzi Maid has a mixed fate, but behind it is a person with great luck. I don’t know what is going on with other lines, at least this is the case with our lineage. . Chengyi, take us with you. No matter how many years it takes, even if it takes a lifetime, let us see the master again, even if it is just a tombstone." Brother Chengxin said to me.
Only then did I truly understand the meaning behind this senior brother. Master had never mentioned it to me. Why? Does he not want me to be bound by this bondage again
But the responsibilities that come with fate cannot always be escaped. We are all people who have lost our master at this moment, just like a group of people who were suddenly thrown into the wilderness and lost. We cannot continue like this, so we can only set a goal and go on. And I am undoubtedly the one to lead, no matter how sad I am.
Suppressing my throat that was still choking, I said as calmly as possible: "Go in, we don't want to stay outside all the time. What we have to do now is two things. The first is to wait for Uncle Li here. He asked us There is always a reason for waiting instead of asking us to see him, so we will wait until he can at least give us an answer. Second, as Ruxue said, Grandma Ling Qing once had some explanations , let’s listen to Ruxue’s explanation.”
As of now, it can only be like this. After calming down, I know what I should do. People are forced out, especially after shouldering responsibilities.
Just like a mother's responsibility to her children, an innocent girl will grow into a brave woman in an instant.
A father's responsibility to the family will make a playful boy grow into a mature man in an instant.
This is true when everyone faces the responsibilities given by life. No matter how unwilling, sad, or evasive you are, in the end you can only carry it, otherwise your life will become a meaningless wasted time. Because you have never taken on anything, for this reason, no matter how successful you are, you are still a loser.
After entering the house, everyone sat down in the room, but Ruxue pulled me up and said to everyone: "I'm sorry, please wait a little longer."
I was dragged by Ruxue in a daze to the place where Master and I were washing. I couldn't understand what Ruxue was going to do.
But Ruxue didn't say anything, she just poured a basin of water in front of me, started to wipe my face, and said calmly: "Since you want to cheer up, then come out looking like you are cheering up, even if it's just an illusion, even if it just makes me feel better." It’s good to feel a little better.”
As she spoke, she put down the veil and applied the shaving cream on the table to my face. After the master left, I had not shaved for almost a week. At this time, my face was covered with beards that could not grow anymore. He has a long, unkempt beard and looks as embarrassed as he wants.
Seeing Ruxue doing all this for me with all her heart, I pulled Ruxue and she gently broke away from me and said, "You want to ask me, am I not sad that my aunt is leaving?"
I nodded in acquiescence.
"I'm sad, I'm sad. I have been taken care of by my aunt since I was a child. In the village, my aunt and I have been together for as long as a month. My aunt always said that our lives are the same. She always feels that I am suffering and treats me poorly. My great aunt has always been my greatest blessing. Do you think I am sad?" When Ruxue said this, she was just like her usual, extremely calm and indifferent, as if she was narrating other people's things.
But she used to be my closest lover, how could I not know that her calmness often hides too many deep feelings. Therefore, I know that the sadness she says may not be half as sad as the sadness in her heart, and she cannot express it.
While talking, Ruxue handed me the razor and said slowly: "But my aunt told me that your master will leave without saying goodbye, and you will definitely be even more sad. So, I thought I wouldn't be so sad that I collapse. , come here and support you."
After saying that, Ruxue said to me softly: "Remember, wash up again and put on clean clothes before you come out. If you are neater, everyone will feel better, and your parents will feel more at ease looking at you."
Looking at Ruxue's back, I felt a trace of sadness in my heart. Why can't she be my wife? Perhaps a long time ago, Master also asked this question, why can't Ling Qing be my wife
This is fate. Even if Ruxue is not my wife, I will not give her the love that a husband gives to his wife just because she is not. This is not something that can be limited by status. This is my passionate feeling.
Just like Master left me, I don’t know where he went, but because he is no longer with me, I will feel that he is not my Master. No matter where he is, he will always be my Master, and I want to Finding him is also my own feeling and I will not violate it.
I followed Ruxue's request and finally cleaned myself up. Then I found my mother waiting for me behind the house. As soon as she saw me, she asked: "Sanwa'er, is that girl Ruxue? Why are you and Ruyue The girl is also very nice, she even confused mom."
I said: "Mom, Ruyue is my sister. But Ruxue and I were separated for many reasons. But I still like Ruxue. Mom, Master is no longer here. I hope you can give me a period of freedom so that I'll just do my thing, okay?"
My mother understood my words immediately and remained silent. She knew that I was telling her that I might not get married or start a family for a long time.
Finally, she sighed and said: "Your father and I will discuss it. Hey, the boy is destined to be the apprentice of Master Jiang, who is like a god. Your father and I have never expected you to be like an ordinary son. If Xue Duo is such a good girl, why should we separate?"
Mom walked away mumbling, and I unconsciously looked up at the sky. How much bitterness does this life have to bring before a person's heart can finally become strong and calm